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Reaper's Kiss

Succumb to the Devil's Bliss,

Release thy soul with the Reaper's kiss,

Breathe thy final breath,

Give up life, give in to Death.

 

Look into the pitiless eyes,

Of he who shall silence the final cries,

Of the living, of the breathing,

As he touches the heart, once beating.

 

He reigns from a darkened throne,

Built upon the ancient bone,

Of those who entered the land of the dead,

Of whom the Fates have split Life's eternal thread.

 

And ask not of what this spectre speaks,

Speak not of what the banshee shrieks,

Wander not those barren lands,

Take not the Harbinger's frozen hand.

 

Come my child, come hither,

From the grasps of he who withers,

Take the hand of one who walks,

The hand with whom the spirits talk.

 

Do not fail the final test,

Thou must choose-- be damned, or blessed,

Take not the Reaper's deadly kiss,

Do not succumb to the Devil's Bliss.

Author notes

Wow, random much. I'll admit I like this one far more than many I've written in the past.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 21 of 21
  • great very powerful start thank you for entering and good luck!


  • Pandoras-Box555
    November 14
    ?
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    Great write! I've got to say, I love how you threw the fates in there.

  • piccola silver member
    December 15, 2007

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    "Do not fail the final test,
    Thou must choose-- be damned, or blessed,
    Take not the Reaper's deadly kiss,
    Do not succumb to the Devil's Bliss.

    thanks for this nice rhyme and your entry. I liked those lines the best I think.


  • LadyDementia gold member
    December 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Great write, you ended it very well. Good luck in the contest!


  • Hebz
    June 16, 2007

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    WOW!!

    Excellent imagery!!Love it all...

    Thanks for entering my contest..& Best of Luck

    GloriousGift
    Heba


  • The Morning Sage
    June 5, 2007

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    w o w! this is beautifully dark poem! the rhythm was right on, and so was the rhyming! i especially, especially love the last stanza! fantastic job, hats off to u and kudos!


  • Dragons Lady
    June 1, 2007

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    This is an awesome write. Very thought provoking. I especially love the way the first and last stanza contradict one another. Well done.


  • sarahblu
    June 1, 2007

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    your word usage is great.. we all make the choice but it is not in death that we choose.i love poems that make me think and examine them closer... very intelligent write


  • Alice Anesthetized
    June 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    the rhyme scheme in this, was amazing.
    i like how the 1st and last stanza match, but contradict eachother. Most of all
    i really like lines 17 and 18
    because they kind of... switched it up for me, and added more variety.
    Overall, this was a very interesting, and appealing write to me.


  • And Hyetal
    June 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, are you kidding me!!! I mean, poetry can't get THIS good, can it??? I like how you kind of... um... (it's a morning, I'm not really good with words yet. ) corrected? yourself at the end. I mean, you said at the beginning, "Succumb to the Devil's Bliss, Release thy soul with the Reaper's kiss," and then you said at the end, "Take not the Reaper's deadly kiss, Do not succumb to the Devil's Bliss."

    This is definately a winner in these contests!!! I'm glad to have met a talented poet like you!

    Always,
    Cassie


  • animated lies
    May 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Awesome! Thanks for re-entering this and following the rules. ^^ I really liked this as a dark entry, actually. The language is very alluring.

    Good luck.
    animated ♥


  • Sesheta
    May 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    For the third time, it's good!

    I like it, a lot, of course. Yay for the rhyming and the creepy dark-deathness! YAY NO MUSHY GROSSNESS~ This has been brought to you via Miss Dallas' English Class


  • SeaWithYourHeart
    May 30, 2007

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    Wo wo wo!!!! Hold it right there
    PEOPLE THIS IS TALENT!!! wow!!!!
    People like you are the reason why I love poetry.
    here we go!

    "Succumb to the Devil's Bliss,
    Release thy soul with the Reaper's kiss,"

    What a beginnig. temptation and the door to the deadly sins are open and If this is the entrance then I have fallen right into it.
    Great rhyme scheme set the pace of my heart as I read it!

    "Breath thy final breath,
    Give up life, give unto Death."

    Wow! This made my heart stop. Great description and simplistic flow of what your saying.

    (Just a thought: when you use caesura you have to balance the connectuive words to make it fit!
    you used "give un to death." hmmm for me it doesnt fit ("give in to death.") would be personally better but hey Ignore me if you disagree. it is still brilliant!

    "Look into the pitiless eyes,
    Of he who shall silence the final cries,"
    this is horrifically beautiful! they way you have worded it is so dramatic It has myeyes locked on every word.

    "Of the living, of the breathing,
    As he touches the heart, once beating."
    I like the way you have stopped the sound and perfect silence roams over the poem. all I could hear after this was the beat of the words. so effective.
    "He reigns from a darkened throne,
    Built upon the ancient bone,
    Of those who entered the land of the dead,
    Of whom the Fates have split Life's eternal thread."
    This to me has a political celestial message that links to society today.
    where the over lord controls the masses.
    it made me think of the Quote: "built on the backs of slaves." a very potent image which you have captured when you described the devils kingship built on suffering bones of the dead.

    "And ask not of what this spectre speaks,
    Speak not of what the banshee shrieks,
    Wander not those barren lands,
    Take not the Harbinger's frozen hand."

    fantastic image of control I like it
    silencing the masses. This invisable link of metaphorical imagery and enjamberment of thoughts. very well written.
    and challenges the title: Succumb to the Devil's Bliss! his heaven your hell not yours. very cool!

    "Come my child, come hither,
    From the grasps of he who withers,
    Take the hand of one who walks,
    The hand with whom the spirits talk."

    Again very good!
    repetition and the balance you create with this mirrored caesura is spot on! makes me home in on the words I feel myself taking the place of the persona.
    The wishbone choice(2 options) juxtapose eachother
    "From the grasps of he who withers,
    Take the hand of one who walks,"
    a choice of life or death Wow this contrasts with the restriction in the verse before.

    "The hand with whom the spirits talk."
    "walks" and "talk?" hmm I personally feel that there should be an (S) on talk but again my private opinion ignore it if you disagree.

    "Do not fail the final test,
    Thou must choose-- be damned, or blessed,
    Take not the Reaper's deadly kiss,
    Do not succumb to the Devil's Bliss."

    The final test! last chance i'm on the edge of my seat what will happen! I want to know (cliff hanger) I want to know the end
    Love the juxtaposition of "dammed and blessed." the tone of each word classes when read tougether giving a biased image of what you would rather choose.
    "Take not the Reaper's deadly kiss,"
    this is beautiful! deadly kiss links with lust and temptation but reapers deadly kiss is also juxtaposed contrasting the ideals of bliss and pure horror.(I like!)

    "Do not succumb to the Devil's Bliss."
    this is the best ending ever to a great story.
    a warning within itself and/or message to the reader.
    Contrasts to the poem title!!!
    IT'S GENIUS!
    My heart still remains in my mouth after reading this.
    I am lost for words at your talent. so much so I have a request please can I decorate my front page with this poem I wanit everyone to read it I will also have a link to your page and your name will be clearly written at the top and bottom of your poem It is that good I want the world to read it and enjoy it as much as I have. I await your permission.
    BRAVO!!!
    Thankypou very much for sharing your poetry.
    You have gained a loyal fan

    I see it is also in a contest well I hope you win i have my fingers crossed.
    and sorry for the length.

  • annake
    May 29, 2007
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    A thought nicely captured. Great job!!


  • Paincalledlove
    May 29, 2007
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    Wo Kyle where did you get the point sto feature this?! Nice work dude. This poem screams out to be liked. nice rhyming and otherish stuffish.


  • animated lies
    May 29, 2007
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    Please make sure to re-read my rules and resubmit your poem if you wish.

    animated ♥


  • The Hermit
    May 29, 2007

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    That is death metal poetry. The flow came in so perfectly along with the rhymes. You already won in my eyes.


  • unchained fears
    May 29, 2007

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    you did a great job on this i love the flow and wording. good luck in the contest my fingers are crossed
    *unchained*


  • ibsons hysops
    May 28, 2007

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    Great Job in penning this!!! Good Luck in the Contest!!!!

  • Paincalledlove
    May 28, 2007

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    Nice

    Very good kyle. Its nice to see you trying rhyme. The ryhme is good in this even if it is just a standard
    A
    A
    B
    B

    Rhyme scheme
    But its good


  • Sanity-Day10
    May 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow I like this poem a lot. I mean my uncle just died about 5 minutes ago, and somehow your poem helped me.. Thanks for writing it.

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