One two
S
T
E
P
Three four
T
W I
R L
Careful not to step on the crinoline!
Sweet 16 and red ribbons of fruition
Glide along the braids of drawn-back hair
“One day you’ll be a real princess” mom said
And as I laid against the wall;
The night waned with every breath
one day i'll fill out this dress
but in the meantime, i'll just play
little big princess
Author notes
look what i can do!
A contest entry
- Visual Escapes 29 ~ Beauty Queen ~ Closes at 20 entries by Amunet Wolfbane.
300 points, ended June 2, 2007, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
first draft with minor edits before post
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Charming
This poet transported me back to the days where rather than spending hours revising for tests and writing monotonous essays, I would wake up exhilarated for a day filled with magic, translucent fabric forts, and never-ending games of "pretty pretty princess." You used the space extraordinarily well. It did wonders in getting across that image of a carefree twirl and a mismatched step. And the simplicity of the language itself truly conveyed the idea of childhood innocence and unabashed credulity. "Little big princess" is absolutely perfect. There is nothing more captivating, more desirable to a child than to be "big" and you captured that feeling perfectly. Overall, I truly enjoyed this. Thank you for sending me back, if only for a moment, to simpler times.
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nice i like the twirl. great write.
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very sweet
yopu did an excellent penning here and love the snow falling in the background, pretty picture too and pretty lovely poem good write
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Oh my! This is just the cutest poem that I have seen in awhile. I absolutely loved the background. It is so pretty and light hearted. Between that and the picture it set the tone for your poem perfectly. I loved how you experimented with the style and the spacing. I got all caught up in the little girl and her imagination. This was a great poem. You did a good job of expressing yourself.
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Oh my! This is just the cutest poem that I have seen in awhile.
I absolutely loved the background. It is so pretty and light hearted. Between that and the picture it set the tone for your poem perfectly. I loved how you experimented with the style and the spacing. I got all caught up in the little girl and her imagination. This was a great poem. You did a good job of expressing yourself.
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This is really cute, I like the lay out alot. Great job here.
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Aww, this is really cute. My entry is nearly the opposite of this, though. I love the word arrangement...it really adds something to the aesthetic appeal.
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hmmmm, you know you have always been creative this is but another example, keep it flowing and good luck in the contest
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