When the pheonix burns dry,
When the ashes swift away in the wind,
I remember riding those wings of burning fire,
When all wasnt lost when I reached for the goal,
I was heading for far away,
I was forever holding my dreams lifting my sword high,
heading for high heavens,
I rushed into the journeys that day with the forever burning sun,
I rushed those battlefields to here that beautiful sound of victory,
All in mind was we were best friends we could not be without each other,
WE were the best warrior,
Remmber Were nothing without each other,
Companionship brought us to this place and narccisism took you away,
Forgive me old pal for what Ive done,
Im hopeing that someday your burning wings will return upon these fields once more,
Then well ride out of this realm,
Into the promised land we searched for,
They feared us in this land and now they dont take second looks,
Where are you,
Where are you,
Ill walk thsoe dwarven mountains,
Ill fight the divine mountain beasts,
Ill roam this land till I find you,
Send me a sign old pal,
For Ive made a pact with my blood I shall not sleep till I have found you,
Maybe your in the forest of mana,
Maybe your in the tower of Heavens,
Ill find you somehow someway,
Cus no victory is worth loseing your best friend.
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Hmm, summarily, its a good read. It gave me a good sense of bond between "you" and your companion, and the goings in this relationship.
It is a good choice to set this up in a fantasy and medieval world because it is in such realm and age where honor and loyalty are most cherished; and it is possible to portray such acts in epic proportion.
I agree, no victory is ever worth the lost of a best friend. How shall we rejoice when we are "alone" in celebration.
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very nice
I love the ending of this one. You are right nothing is worth losing your best friend over. Sometimes a BEST friend is a once in a lifetime thing.
Never let go your best friend. You can replace houses, clothes, and money but a best friend cannot be bought for any sum of money.
God bless you buddy, Mark

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And if you have lost your best friend, is victory then worth it?
"swift away" - nice.
Break b/w 3rd and 4th line might helps, as in general spacing helps the reader to read, ponder, and comprehend. Admittedly, the 4/5th lines would be better, or random/by concept. Or something.
sword - high heavens heading. "He who lives by the sword shall die by the sword is not an occult threat but an occult promise" - Refine thy intelligence and thus thy self-expression is one way of saying it.
here? or hear? (beautiful sound). Alt, "...to here, that beautiful sound of victory/All in mind...": no comma b/w the lines.
Rememeber
We're
I've
etc.
Good stuff. Relationship stuff. Tuff enuff, but the flames burns on.
Love is within, directed unto
Without. Thus art thou never with
Out. The Phoenix Ever Rises.
Over and Out,
Master Anarchy.


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wow
I really feel the emotion in this piece. Time heals all. It will take awhile but you will get over this. If it is meant for you two to be together again, it will happen...
Yvonne


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great write
keep up the good work this is a very deep and emotion filled write that you can be proud to have penned


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Wow
This is amazing. Very deep, emotional. You have wonderful flow here. Very moving as well.
"Ill walk thsoe dwarven mountains,
Ill fight the divine mountain beasts,
Ill roam this land till I find you,"
That was my favorite part.
Wonderful write!

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"Ill walk thsoe dwarven mountains,
Ill fight the divine mountain beasts,
Ill roam this land till I find you,"
I Love this part..
I like how you like & cherish your friendship.Also, great imagery..
Keep it up
<3
GloriousGift
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That was very very deep, and in a very beautiful imaginary way. Sure, nothing worth losing your best friend. Thank you for such a touching piece!

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awwwwwwwwwwwww this was awesome write my friend! it is a great tribute to your best friend! keep up the great job...God bless you


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Excellent!!!!!!!!!!
Oh wow ! You never seize to amaze me !
Because i know the story behide this , it makes it even more meaningful !
Such moving words to a best friend!
You have talent my son dont ever give that up.
my emotional responce is what an honor you give to your friend !
love
ya
(mom)

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