Hindsight

We loved as only teenagers can;
emotions swirling and thickening the air.
Those who surrounded us
- our forgotten friends and family -
chocked on our mushy smoochy,
entwining, inseparable lust.
We dreamed of forever,
just us two.
The world didn’t exist,
beyond what we created
in the vacuum of our minds.
Oh, gods, how I loved him.
It hurt when I was alone,
and the joy of being together
was overwhelming.
Love letters; sweet, sweet
saccharine words of promise
I devoured and held close to my heart.
He worshiped me,
my body, my soul.
And I surrendered myself to him
- completely -
my body, my soul.

But we were only teenagers.
We couldn’t even understand those emotions
that swirled and thickened the air around.
Long lost family had waited,
for the lust to abate.
Friends were there to catch me
when I chocked on the mushy smoochy
love that never existed.
Forever lasted three months,
before the two became three.
When the world came crashing
through the vacuum of my mind,
filling it with wisdom and understanding
- isn’t it amazing what hindsight sees?
I never really loved him at all!
Oh, the embarrassment in that:
how I pawed, and fawned, and wept
all because of him.
Love letters were put in a box,
and stored under my bed;
those sweet, sweet saccharine words,
soured by broken promises.
He worshiped me,
my body, for a time.
And I surrendered my heart to him
- completely -
but when he stomped on it,
broke it, and tore it in two,
I took it back
and gave him a punch in the nose.