The proud oaf of apparent misanthrope,
the skeptic, the scoffer content in apathy
can express himself through his sneers only,
and remains consistently lonely in bigotry.
No modesty, but misery, no recovery, but ruin,
his descent to atrophy brings an end too soon,
yet he stands sure, with no future in a cocoon
lest to a poison of decay could he be immune.
The sloth found complacency in a land of dreams
from an opiate rising only to a lifeless regime,
yet plans born of remiss and mindlessness seem
to accomplish naught, they leave nothing undreamed.
Author notes
Option 1: Sloth
In a list
A contest entry
- Seven Cardinal Sins by Patched Up Ragdoll.
600 points, ended June 7, 2007, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Ohh I comented this with a big long reaction to your words. but unforunatly my computer wouldnt let me post it, and I don't have the patience to type it out again.
But I'd still like you to know that this poem says alot, and I can appreciate that.
Kaitlyn
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HOODWINKED!
i love the Odyssey! i love how you used this refrence!
the subtle use of alliteration in this is really good, and the rhyme really flowed.
great write that really did deserve gold!
LXF
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Genious
I found your page through a friend of mine who wrote a poem on you..the poem was great so I sought to see this brilliant writer...and she was write...you're very talented...and I can tell that you are really smart..I'm quite impressed and I decided to comment this one because it rhymed....I'm more of a lyricist than a poet..so rhyming hits the spot for me..
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Brilliant
Amazing piece of work. I liked it a real lot. There is just so must to savor and so much to understand with in this piece. (=. It relates to be so well the "slothiness" of man.
"to accomplish naught, they leave nothing undreamed." - What an incredible line. It almost gives me a feeling of accomplishment for dreaming all the dreams. lolz.
Wow. That's good poetry. Bookmarked.
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Amazing
I am so pleased to see a gold trophy in recognition of this excellent piece. Superb. ~Pam
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This is incredible. Your win is very much understood and for this, very well deserved. I'm in awe of how you formed this and of the wording you used to paint such an eloquent picture. Incredible job.
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Philosopher too?
Well, well...looks like you have the makings of a philosopher...and a poet. The flow of the piece...the image...really gave me the look of a lazy, good-for-nothing sloth. Good luck in the contest, man. I loved it.
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Simply amazing...wow. This was very well written, thank you so much for entering. Good luck!!
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WELCOME TO ALLPOETRY!
Well I do not think that a critique is needed here at all. This piece reads as if written by a professional poet. I loved it.
I am a greeter and wanted to welcome you. Feel free to ask me any questions.
Despair
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Standing "O"
I really enjoyed reading this work. You might want to tyr, "leaving nothing to dream." However, this is only a suggestion, as the way you have written this is fine also. Thanks for posting this work.
Chris
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