Pale, white images are stuck on my face
Confined to feelings that are ripped out of place
Ignored to a point where I'm lost in this grief
I search for an escape that gives me relief
Razors swim freely in this red-tinted tub
No water is needed, just a pool of my blood
Drowning in despair yet not losing life
I force myself under to rid me of strife
But nothing will happen, I can live with pain
Therefore I go back and dig once again
Removing the tissues - burdens to my soul
Killing [your] damage is my only goal
Unleashing the chaos, that's burning within
I pick up my scalpel and chase my dull skin
They tell me to breathe and it will be alright
But inhaling hopelessness won't help me tonight
I can't break the habit that cures me inside
I can lie to you, and I surely can hide
A promise made to you, I'll forget about
My form of existence is to breathe in and bleed out
Author notes
I don't want anyone to get worried because of this write.
I'm surprised myself by how I came up with it.
I haven't [seriously] cut myself for almost a year.
Or so, I'd want you to believe.
In a list
A contest entry
- " Life From The Dark Side " by wingsofgold25.
500 points, ended June 3, 2008, 35 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Darkest poems by HatedLoveDieingRose.
400 points, ended December 5, 2008, 18 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 65 of 65
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Though I don't condone the practice at all, I can understand its purpose as a survival-method. My boyfriend is an ex-cutter, as are many of my dearest friends, and it breaks my heart that you, of all people, felt the need to embody pain in such a horrendous way
Anyway, I'm glad to know you've since stopped, at least at the time of this poem. If you ever want to talk about it, well... poke me! I love you with all of my evil little heart
s and ♥
L.
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wow.....
Thats all i can say is wow.. this poem left me speechless!!!!! i loved it..good job! -
thought provoking
i am glad you stopped cutting. not being a cutter myself, it offers a deep insight into the emotions tied with it, the emotional pain people feel that is so great that they feel physical pain is the only way to drown it out. great write and nice rhyme flow.
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good job.. n i can relate a lot.. good luck
♥always Kate
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This was an excellent poem on cutting If you have not cut in about a year I ZPray you will have a complete recovery ( if this is true or just a poem either way you did a fantastic job on this Thank you for your entry and good Luck in the contest.
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first and foremost, that title/end line is really effective. and good on you for not cutting for so long!
the fact that you sustained the rhyming scheem so well and simply is good, but somehow the aabbccdd etc. rhyme seemed a bit too simplistic for the piece? a little too...i dunno. it just didn't workt hat well for me. but still, it is good rhyme and that is always good.
irregardless (and that is just me and my tastes) this is a really good poem - brilliantly written. and thanks for entering it. -
Okay let's see i don't know where to begin.
how about this AMAZING!
Very emotional on so many levels!
It has really touched my heart!
People has told me to just breath but it doesn't work sometimes everyone has to just bring out the blade!
BRAVO!!!
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this is such a beautifully written poem about pain. i can really relate and love how you wrote this!
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Thank you
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i can relate to sooo many parts of this. the big one being your authors comments, the last two lines. i loved this. the whole thing though i have to say my favorite lines were "They tell me to breathe and it will be alright But inhaling hopelessness won't help me tonight" thankyou so much for entering my contest and best of luck!
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You have exceptional creative imagery. I applaud thee.
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WOW
OUTSTANDING
HEARTBREAKING
AND SIMPLY AMAZING!!!!
I loved this piece. It not only made me feel but it hurt me. I got so into it that when I got to the part where it says "Therefore I go back and dig once again" and "I pick up my scalpel and chase my dull skin" it really hurt me. Made me feel like it was happeneing to me. Great job, thanks for entering and good luck.
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chilling amazing wow dark, pain filled
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i like this, nice description and all. The length of the poem was nice, and the background choice and pic only make me enjoy this more. so wonderful job!
i find it unique and intresting.
thanks for your entry
good luck
stephanie =] -
Awesome. I'm impressed. I have very very high standards when it comes to cutting pieces... and this was amazing... blew them all way outta the water. PERFECT.
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WOW.... I'm impressed! Best entry so far, and I don't say that to a lot of people. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck.
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to me i find it saddening (sp?) and yet almost serene if you will. i've personally havent cut before but my best friend has and just reading your poem with what she had to say its amazingly similar. it seems like you're calm in telling this poem but it still has an undercurrent of pain or suffering. either way i loved it very much. superb job.
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Dark it is .. bloody it is.. but I think it lacked the power I was searching for, But I loved the last line!! Goodluck.
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Hood-Winked!
I can't say that I can relate to cutting, I have never done this. What sad emotions you have described within your write. If you ever need to talk I am here. Wonderful imagery and flow.
You have just been Hood-Winked courtesy of the Poetic Bandits I have enjoyed reading your wonderful and brilliant writes today. Have a great day
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Thank you for offering help when I need it ...
About not being able to relate to cutting ... you should be very happy for that. It becomes like an addiction and I'm glad I got rid of it, but urges still tempt me on many days...
Thank you
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Wow...that's freakin awesome! I love it! Brilliant work!
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First of all, if you would like any links to places which can help your cutting habits.... oh you've stopped, congratulations. I hope you can keep clear but still be able to write such amazing poetry. The emotions inside of this is truly brilliant, I loved each line of it especially how you wrote this line
"Killing [your] damage is my only goal".
Rhyming is done brilliantly. Thank you for the entry!
Bandaid. -
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Thank you
and yea, I've stopped a long long time ago
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This i very good i love the say the stanza's flow together i really enjoyed reading this good job!
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This is the perfect example of why I constantly read your work, it like I cant stop.
great write
Hope you continue on your path of non cutting -
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And this is a perfect example of what I can't seem to write anymore.
Thank you
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forgot aplauses...
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Amazing, I loved it. It was great and the picture matched it perfectly. Can anyone say bookmark? Lol, great job!
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I love this lots, its so dark, yet pretty to. the imagery created is extremly powerful, i really enjoyed that. the rhyming you used was really powerful which helped create a amazing flow, its amazing what you can write without realising how you wrote it this poem is extremly sad however it is also a beautiful write, so well done in creating that. Thankyou so much for entering and goodluck
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Love it! The imagery is vivid and memories or images from this piece are strong and emotional. Very beautifully dark yet sad. An awesome flow with good rhyme.
Nicely done.
Thanks for entering and much luck.
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Whoa.....
this is really good, really deep and dark. I LOVE these lines:
Unleashing the chaos, that's burning within
I pick up my scalpel and chase my dull skin
AND
"Razors swim freely in this red-tinted tub
No water is needed, just a pool of my blood
Drowning in despair yet not losing life"
It's so deep and full of emotion, kudos!
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Thank you ... try writing when you're broken .. it always comes out deep.
Thank you
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Hmm.. the poem itself is very nicely written... it's a hub of your emotions i feel..The pool of blood... well expressed.. I am at a loss of words.. you have been very honest in this write. Well written.. The general theme of the poem is purely dark... but you have been able to weave magic through your words.. all said and done,.. I congratulate you for your amazing write...
My fave part:
"Unleashing the chaos, that's burning within
I pick up my scalpel and chase my dull skin
They tell me to breathe and it will be alright
But inhaling hopelessness won't help me tonight"
Thanks for entering the Raven Qualifier and Good Luck.
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Beautiful. If anyone asks if I cut, I'll say "no comment" so PLEASE don't ask. But this poem really reached to me, it makes sense. I love it.
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I understand how you really don't want the question to be asked, and will refuse to respond.
But saying "no comment" says clearly that you do cut.
At times like that, I change the topic or ask them "Does it matter?"
It has worked so far for me.
Thank you
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I love this poem! Very unique! I wonder if I can ever make one that good! And yes It's a compliment! =P Applaud for you!!!
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Wonderful
This is a wonderful poem, I love the images you put into my mind and the emotions you portray in each verse. Bundles of strife and pain. Good work -
Great poem that holds a large bundle of emotion and strife. I loved it immediately, and I'm glad that not only are you not cutting anymore, but that instead you seem to pour out these powerful pieces. Loved it.
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this is amazing! i cannot even think of a word to describe this, i write poetry with the same emotion, bt u have serious talent girl!
I cut to this day n can understand everything your feeling in these few stanzas...
keep up the amazing work! -
I absolutely ADORE this poem...You are an incredible writer, this is the only poem of yours i have read so for but i love it. And it makes it easier to understand the feeling when ive been in that situation...still am. No i am not suicidal...anymore..but i use to be, i still cut but now it isnt necessarily to end my life but more so escape for a while, and its also a coping mechanism. Again I love this poem and im sure i will love the rest of them also I hope you continue writting in the future because you could really make something of yourself through your writting...
~Lauryn -
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Thank you so much for the comment.
I just ... would want you to stop cutting yourself. I have no way of talking you out of it, because I've tried. But it's really not right.
If you ever want to talk, I'll try my best to push everything aside and open an ear for you.
Take care and thank you
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wow
Soo... wrong. Amazing poem but how can harming yourself solve your problems? All it does is cause you pain and physical scars to remind you of the events that have transpired. People shouldn't self-harm, it solves nothing. Amazing poem though!
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I don't self harm.
And I completely agree with you.
I just had to let some of my anger out so that I don't actually cut.
I've gotten relief from cutting so I needed to feel it for a while.
And so I decided to picture it myself, without any harm
Thanks alot though
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My goodness, dear! This is absolutely beautifully written. I hope you'll write to feel better more than you'll cut to feel better, but I know that as much as writing helps, there's nothing like cutting except cutting. Take care of yourself. You've got such a talent--don't rob the world of it.
You're beautiful and this is an incredible write. "Inhaling hopelessness won't help me tonight..." f***in' beautiful! Great write. Best wishes in your contest and everything else. Thanks for sharing. Take care.
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"You've got such a talent--don't rob the world of it."
wow .. lol .. thank you
I've never gotten a comment like that before.
Don't worry, I plan to stay away from cutting.
Just had to write this to get some urges out of my way .. nothing more
Thank you so much
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Well I meant it 100%. And I'm glad to hear you're planning to stay away from cutting. You should read my writing on cutting--they're in my list "Dark" or something. One's called "Hating Everything," and the other's called "Now I Know Just How it Feels." So glad you're here. Talk to ya later!
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Increadibly amazing
WOW! I love this poem...it's so deep and depressing. I can completely relate to it. -
very very well written. I hope you are nor serious about these words though. Great work.
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Nope, I'm not serious at all.
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Powerful
I like it all--how you say every line & every word & how it flows..Great Job..
& tho it's gr8 u didn't cut urself over than a year, I wonder why u cut urself from the beginning..I think nth is worse a pain over ours--I mean if u r already suffering, why u hurt urself more--it's needless...
AnyWay...Pen On & keep it up..
Gr8 Job..
GloriousGift
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Hmm ...
Now that I think of it, I don't know why I ever began cutting. I switched from cutting to writing so I don't have the same mentality anymore.
But at that time, I had a lot of problems and couldn't find solutions nor support. I needed some way to get rid of the emotional pain and so I countered it with physical.
But I've stopped, and I plan to remain this way
Thank you
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I'm very glad that you switched the way you were reliefing your pain..
You're mostly welcome
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INCREDIBLE
How chilling a write this is!!!! You have captured something here that allows me to relate to your intensity. I am touched and moved and deeply saddened but feel a great connection to you. This is an awesome write. It is filled with passion and imagery. The image you use here is perfect and keeps me enthralled in the write! Great job! -
this poem is actually very well written, it's just a subject i hate, but i'm not here to tell anyone what to write. this flows good and has some pretty nice vocabulary.
I haven't [seriously] cut myself for almost a year.
Or so, I'd want you to believe.
that last little line there, that kinda ruined it for me -
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First of all, thank you for a comment
Even if it's a subject you hate
It's not my favourite subject either
It just came when I got urges to do so after an argument.
What about the last line ruined it?
It's not part of the poem, it's part of my notes... -
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well. i dont understand, its like saying i havent cut in a while but really i have i just dont want you to know. but its saying that outloud.
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Well, really, I'd leave that up to you to interpret.
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This poem is so amazing, and I'm glad that you haven't seriously cut your self for over a year. great job!!!
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WOW
This is amazing! It really catches your attention and when you read it you read faster and faster till it gets to the end! this is so breath takingly great! great write keep it up love ya x
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that's amazingly good
and congrats on the one year or however long it's been -
OMG! This is so well written that it turned my stomach. The image is too vivid and too awful. It’s hard to believe that people can be driven to this point for real. You my dear are an artist with the pen.
Love,
Amera
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Impressive.
Wow. This is just absolutely phenomenal.
When I think of a comment good enough for this... I'll get back to you.
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Amazing job on this.
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Holy shit, this is fucking awesome. Love the last line of this, deep and powerful and just fucking good! AWESOME job on this, my new favorite from you.
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