sands of shallow promise
shoveled in and smoothed
to seem unsorrowed
granules of growing want
compressed with care
to mimic strength
overturned in cautious, castle form
and flagged with pristine pretense
begging audience
despairing
eminence
of high tide
In a list
A contest entry
- 15 Lines or Less, Free Verse Only - Prompt - "I ignore the empty spaces of my life and try to fill them up with details" by Cupcrazy.
450 points, ended May 22, 2007, 14 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
I love CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM. Any suggestions?
Comments
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Loved the images one gets when reading this - wonderful metaphor used here - sensational silver winner in this contest.
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A wonderful piece, I loved the metaphor in this one, since I live on an Island, I find the tides cover a myriad of sins, washing away self at times. Nice form and flow. Thanks for this great entry. Hugs, Bunny
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