With tickly-soft fingers, her touch lingers
And her high-pitched voice reverberates
Her delicate profile skips in my head
Like an old 45
Those wide eyes, she squints
With a drawn out smile, she sprints
“Daddy! Daddy! Look at me!”
An orchestra of sound
Not one cloud around
Black tar burning beneath her feet
I swoon to her tune—then my chest swells
It’s back to the classroom…
I remember this chapter well
“Daddy! Daddy! Look at me!”
Then comes a moment that is golden
Reminiscent from olden
She returns to her place,
She said she touched base
Then she asks a question at the end:
“If you want to make a friend,
You have to be a friend—right Daddy?”
And she zooms off again:
“Daddy! Daddy! Look at me!”
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 30 of 30
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"An orchestra of sound" and Daddy! Daddy! Look at me! is celebratory...a joyful symphony...shiny-true-life-poetry...which touches the reader's heart...there are no cul-de-sacs within but beautiful open and free fields of emotion, appreciation and security in the two-way street traversed from feeling replete. Especially liked the inclusion of her pearls of wisdom..
Joy and jubilliation
Luvverly Jubbly
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Thank you very, very much. As I've said to others commenting on this, this is about my daughther whom I love deeply. What you say is so true: it is a 2-way street with us. I can still hear her voice in my brain and soul from that day to this one. Thank you for honoring me with this reading and great comment.
AsIThink...
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Such are the gifts our children give to us. This is a precious write...a moment captured for all time by your adroit pen. The way you describe the energy of your child at play... you can feel that innocent, carefree nature just beaming through your words...along with your love for her. Then that moment of realization, knowing that what you have taught her has become a part of who she is. Knowing the profound influence we have in moulding the character of our children. A true smiley moment!...Priceless. A pleasure to read...Alby
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awwww...gosh, what a wonderful, wonderful feeling it was to read your comments about this piece alby. I must have read this about 3 times to let it sink in. Thank you very much for saying this and helping me to reflect on just how cemented it all is for me with my baby. Yes, I love her more than words can hope to describe (as you and so, so many parents know first hand about your own). This piece is one of my personal favs and no doubt, having your precious comments here to grace this piece makes it more special to me. I really appreciate this feedback.
AsIThink...
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This makes my heart swell. We need more dads like that.
Rae
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Wow, you're reading faster than I can comment. Oh my...I see you've found one of my personal favs about my little baby (smiling). She's behind me now as I type. Her brother just asked her, "...would you like to play Tic-Tac-Toe with me?" She said, "Sure. I'll Tic and you Tac..." LOL. Gosh I love this girl! Thank you so much for reading this and for your kind sentiment.
AsIThink...
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these moments are priceless... the joy of children
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This little girl is priceless (smiling). So easy to love; to write about. That you for reading this one especially - about one of the greatest loves of my life.
AsIThink...
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This is truly a beautiful touching piece, and it sounds like a wonderful relationship!!
Can imagine how proud you were to hear:
“If you want to make a friend,
You have to be a friend—right Daddy?"
Great stuff!!
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haha...yeah, I was so very proud of 'that' moment. Lots of those ones here (and for my part, I really thank God for it all). Thank you so much for reading this piece. As it's about my daughter, it is undoubtedly one of my personal favs...
AsIThink...
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I came for a visit and found your childrens poems,
It is just as you say it is for all of us, brilliant.
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ronnica, thank you very much for these touching words of empathy. Great to see you again. I really appreciate this read and visit. Glad you liked it.
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This is Wonderful! I love children, especially mine, and this piece is so alive! I can hear the little one in my head, I can see the scene, I can feel the sunshine and warmth. It is prevalent that you love your baby, as you should. Children are a gift and I am sure you know this, as you accepted this gift with wonderful grace, the love in this piece is astoundingly loud! You are truly an amazing writer Dear Poet! Keep the Muse Alive! She loves you!
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Thanks a billion. My baby girl? Hmmmm... That little girl melts my heart (all the time). Yeah, I don't know how it becomes solid again in time for pumping though... I would accept this gift over and over again. She loves me and I love her (my words are too weak to express it though).
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Love it!
I really like this poem. I can not have children but you give me the feeling of knowing what it would be like..if you understnad what i mean lol. love it .
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Thank you very much. I am really pleased that this had that sort of an effect on you. If ever I was glad to post something (especially with this being about my daugther), I'm so glad to have posted this. You have honored me. Thanks again.
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Aww. this was so sweet.. I loved it.. It was like you sucked me into your poem.. That rarely happens.. Thank you for sharing this..
Jetleena
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Geez, of all the pieces you read, you picked up on my favorite (lol). You have no idea what this means to me. I am really impressed that this piece kept your attention. Funny huh? I wrote it out of pure love of my daughter (and people like it). I guess it's like a double-treat for me (lol). Thanks so much for this read/comment of yours.
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It caught my attention because it reminded me of a dream..lol. But anyway.. you can tell how much you love your daughter in this piece.. You have such a weak spot for her I'm very sure.. And the same goes for her too I would think... You portray her as the angel that she is..
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My knees, Jet, my knees...they're like noodles. lol... Her on me? "Daddy, you're the best daddy in the whole world. And the universe." So, I guess she kinda goes for me too (lol). I love that one more than these simple words of mine...
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Oh..
Pretty. I like this alot. I can see the image in my head so well. It makes me wonder what i was like when i was young..
Lol. I liked it though.
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Thank you for spending some of your time with this poem. I really appreciate your feedback. Yeah, the childhood days, huh? Only...I remember (lol). I just don't know what my mother was going through though...lol.
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sweet
Nicely done. I'm glad to see you found another talent and decided to share.
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Thanks very much. It's not nearly as sweet as the 4 year old who inspired it...She's love on 2 legs. Another talent? And thanks too, for taking the time to read from me...
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This one i know. I have three (now grown) little sweetheart My how i miss those early years when i was the one and only hero.
OK i know that we have to take back seat to the boyfriends and husband but they are still my babies.
A beautiful piece that gave both pleasure and relived memories Excellent Thank you
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Thanks so much for the kind reflections and treasured comments. You know for certain how weighty their love is for you when you still hear their beautiful voices and they are no where in sight. Of all the feedback I've received, these connected to my daughter hold the most weight. So, thanks again for the read...
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What an adorable piece...you must be real proud of her...
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Thank you so much for this read and comment. "Adorable" is more her speed. A huge "Dora" fan...I love her so much. It could be 20 below and thinking about her could keep me warm.
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sweet!
I know all too well the wonderment and joy you must
feel in the presence of your little "gift" from god.
Great read!!
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Sugary-sweet!
She'll-make-my-teeth-fall-out sweet. Yeah, "wonderment" is a good-enough word. EXCEPT, she's not a little "gift" - she's a huge one (lol). 4 y.o. going on 25 (lol). Thanks for the review.
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