the almost silent patter of rain
touches my window
bringing the soaking night
into my view
my window is open
as the smell of rain comes in.
a feeling, a taste
i haven't felt in so long.
the sky is dark
but the rain is slow, consistent-
breathtakingly beautiful
as it darkens the wood,
hazes the lights,
and drugs my room
with its cool, fresh scent.
it begins to come down faster
soaking the surprised walkers
in this early night.
you cant see the rain,
even in the lights,
but you can hear the constant patter,
the beating of my aching heart.
My feelings are flooded,
just like these vacant streets.
he hasn't left yet-
he stays slowly, consistently
pouring himself in.
My love for the rain
the love in my heart
will always be here;
it'll always come back
when i least expect it too.
without warning, without doubt.
it pours, it soaks
you never forget the feeling
m. m. o'malley
Author notes
i used option#7
hope you like it. let me know.
this is like my old style, and maybe i can finally go back to that.
©♥
A contest entry
- 8 options of madness by McFairy.
2000 points, ended June 2, 2007, 44 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ♥ I need some fine wine. And you? You need to be nicer! ♥ by forbidden-colour.
300 points, ended August 21, 2007, 5 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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"without warning, without doubt.
it pours, it soaks
you never forget the feeling"
This was sad, I'm in total love with the rain, I just love it,
Thanks for entering sweety.
x
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well im happy you liked it babe.
happy judging
i love the rain too.
♥PrettyLady
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Very nice example of form poetry.Each sentence builds on the other sentence.The content is very good. I like how you compare love with rain. In also brings in the other senses one can feel more of your write. It very true one can not forget a good rainstorm or love. It leaves something behind for a person.There nothing better to be in love on a rainy day. This is well done. I enjoyed reading it.
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im really happy you liked it.
thanks so much.
♥.love.
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Nice work.
you got your point across with beautiful expression!
Rainy days I hate because I feel trapt but you feel released? kinda weird but awesome. God bless you! good luck!
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i feel release in those rainy days, like my heart can finally pour out its feelings.
thanks&&happy you liked it.
♥
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I really enjoyed this. I enjoyed how you wove imagery and emotion together with the subject and you did it very well. No muddled words, no pretnetion. Very nice write. Thank you for entering and best of luck to you.
One thing, this contest was to be anonymous, perhaps the name should have been left off of the poem?
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well im really happy you liked it. the imagery and emotion together is what i actually love to do, and i dont do it often enough anymore. maybe thats what my poetry is lacking. idk.
m.m.o'malley isnt my s/n, its just my name i guess. sorry.
♥.love.
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this is amazing bby face.
xox
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thanks darling, im glad you liked it.
a little different from what you're used to reading.
ily♥
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gorgeous, just like you.
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thanks baby,
im glad you liked it.
♥
p.s. check out my contest if you'd like.
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Beautiful
I love it, so full of imagery and emotions. Your words paint the sceen so perfertly, I could see those who weren't perpared scatter from the street leaving it vacant. Just like the love in your heart, seems to leave and when you least expect and no longer want it to it creeps up on you. This is awesome. Very enjoyable. BEst wishes in the contest.
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thanks baby. im really happy you liked it. the image, one night i probably wont forget.
i dont know what else to say. my mind is somewhere else right now and it probably will be for some time. you know why.
but again thanks
iloveyou♥
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