under the cartoon sky
another entertainment.
I was put here
to remind them of the depths of the hole,
it should be simple, all these contrived confections
winding affectations, but it‘s not. These swindles
landing here at the edge of this shallow hole
underneath that cartoon sky,
the children looking on.
that’s all I know
the grinding gears go round
we go by, our poles reaching out
and we are pulled in
one by one.
Author notes
Written July 30th, 2003
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1 - 8 of 8
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Damn those candy colored clouds,
you get close and POW it was just a sunset
they were storm clouds after all.
Taking the rosey tints off!
Jules.
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I do love chocolate and yes I am even addicted to it.....lol
I must also say it gives me ideas that I really shouldn't have or so I am told but that's another story for another time.
Great Write! -
wow
Ahhh the lights go on. True. True.
this winks for you!
Keep Feelin' Fascination,
~Tiffany~ -
Complex, at first, but at the same time, so simple - human nature
"and we are, pulled in
one by one.
Another superb and thought provoking piece.
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Your titles actually mean things - I'm always so tired by the time I get to the titles... I just pick a line or something, it's like picking a birthday present and then wrapping it in newspaper - it's pathetic, but it doesn't even matter. But yes, "Chocolate" - all these things are addictive enough, cartoons and simplicity. Everything fits.
The movement of the poem and some of the word selection seemed quite sexual "grinding"... and then "the edge of this shallow hole"...that said innocence
I don't know
I don't really need to know.
Bloody wonderful.
How could anyone know nature. -
this was good. Nice choice of background and text color, it gave a feel to it. Nice write, keep up the good work. Peace out
Luke
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I adore this... I must admit, the title threw me, but i think it works :-)
I especially love these lines;
"that’s all I know
the grinding gears go round
we go by, our poles reaching out
and we are pulled in
one by one. "
Always impressed by your work, this is wonderful.
~ Wendy
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devastating. temptations are hard to resist, especially when they are chocolatey ones, i like it, abit abstract though. but i think i got the point you were trying to get across, thanks sor sharin, i enjoyed reading this.
Jillian
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