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When We Were Young

 

 

This moment

this hour and time

 

I feel your hand

reaching... for me

 

across eternity

through the distance

 

stretching out

to bring me close again

 

I plead... almost weeping

 

come to me

when I dream

 

draw me near

my sweet brother

 

let me see you holding me

laughing at our treasured memories

 

when I was with you

when we were young

 

I love you

my precious one

 

come to me... please

 

in my dreams

 

 

 

 

 

LeeL

 

 

Author notes

I will write on Option Four
Words for her loved brother

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

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Comments

1 - 34 of 34

  • -LilacThOughts- gold member
    May 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    So comforting...

    Rick I want to thank you, for this beautiful comforting poem, it has touched me deeply...I like the way you have personalised it to my own thoughts and dreams...I do like to dream about him, but mostly my dreams are still too painful...however one day I know your words will enter my dreams and when that happens I think I will be feeling peace

    Much love...
    ~Lilac


    • Endeavor gold member
      May 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Lilac


      Above all I wish you peace

      Take your mind to the wonderfull days you shared together in your lives

      I thank you

      Rick

  • Lady Dragonwyck
    May 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Very soft memory filled write. Enjoyed very much.

    Lady Dragonwyck


  • KainLegin
    May 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    So deep, my friend. It's one wonderful peice. waking the feelings of brotherhood or even friendship since some friends are like brothers themselves.


  • getsbetter
    May 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Very, very beeautiful my friend. I thank you so much for taking the time to write this for my AP Wife. I love it...GETS


    • Endeavor gold member
      May 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      GETS


      I make the words almost as a prayer
      Often I live with my lost brother, in my dreams
      I wish her the same peace

      Thank you both for caring for my words

      Rick


  • Nature Song silver member
    May 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    When you were young come to me in my dreams! Lovely line. Remember me, know I'm always there! ~Sie Good luck in your contest

    • Endeavor gold member
      May 21, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Sie


      You felt my words

      For that I am greatfull

      Rick


  • Ur Supergurl silver member
    May 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    lovely

    short, sweet. i loved it. i too have a brother that i love dearly and i find this write very well written. the flow is great as well. well done, sweetie. -Sable-

    • Endeavor gold member
      May 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Girl


      Thank you for liking my words

      You are very kind

      Rick


  • catz Moderators member
    May 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is a lovely poem, Rick. I know Lilac will appreciate it. It's the kind of poem which radiates feelings of love and longing.
    These lines especially touched me:

    "I feel your hand
    reaching... for me

    across eternity
    through the distance

    stretching out
    to bring me close again"

    Beautiful and I wish you the best in the contest


    Dee


    • Endeavor gold member
      May 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Dee


      I thank you for appreating my words

      I hope she is moved as well

      and will find him in her dreams

      Rick


  • trista gold member
    May 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Hi Rick...

    This is absolutely beautiful. I love the thoughts and often wish I could have a dream so sweet as this, about the brother I never even had a chance to meet. I hope these words bring a bit of comfort to Lilac, as they have to me.

    Much love and best wishes in the contest,
    ~J.


    • Endeavor gold member
      May 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Sweet Trista


      I see many from the past in my dreams

      Often I see my brother Joe, I relive our times together and even make new ones. Thoes are my good dreams

      Thank you for saying beautiful

      Rick


  • JoyfulWriter
    May 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is so exquisite and so breathtaking! Quite the magnificent piece for this contest...Enjoyed this so much! Smiles, Terry

    • Endeavor gold member
      May 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Terry


      Thank you so much for saying Breathtaking

      Thank you for reading me

      Rick


  • storiesuntold gold member
    May 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Very nice indeed

    • Endeavor gold member
      May 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Stories


      Very nice is very good

      I thank you

      Rick


  • Water Color Sky
    May 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Very nice write. This reminds me of thoes golden summers you remember having as a young child. When your memory looks hazey and the air looks full of thick gold smoke. Great write here. Thanks so much for sharing.
    -Ashley

    • Endeavor gold member
      May 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Ashley


      Glad this gave you a memory

      I appreate you reading me

      Rick


  • loveinhim16
    May 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    it reminds me of summers past and the ups and downs of life. i love the flow it just rolled out of my mouth wen i read it. ill be looking for more
    ~maygen~


    • Endeavor gold member
      May 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Maygen


      Thank you for reading me

      Love to have you read "Forever and a Day"

      On my Focus Poems... Rick


  • Laura
    May 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is so beautiful you have an amazing talent for capturing the minds of the readers very well done to you and good luck in the contest xxx

    • Endeavor gold member
      May 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Laura


      Thank you so much for reading this

      You have a great talent yourself

      Rick


  • XxGoldenxXDawnxX
    May 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is a beautiful poem Rick, so full of tender emotions and the imagery is stunning. I enjoyed reading this. My favourite lines are:-

    I feel your hand

    reaching for me



    across the eternity

    through the distance


    Those are just really beautiful words and bring with them thoughts of longing. You are a great poet Rick, keep writing.



    • Endeavor gold member
      May 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Dear Dawn


      Thank you for quoting me

      I hope she feels this in her heart
      she misses her brother so much each day

      Rick


  • Elfin
    May 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    A very nice write Endeavor,but you have a typo on line 14,it should read "stretching" but other than that everything is fine. Good luck in the contest. Val

    • Endeavor gold member
      May 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thank you Val


      I made the change, I am a spelling retard

      I appreate your thoughts

      Rick


  • soulfultia gold member
    May 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    A beautiful write, carrying a familiar soft tone always reaching the reader and delivering a gentle smile. Lovely work, good luck in the contest and as always, my pleasure to read ~Tia


    • Endeavor gold member
      May 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Tia


      Thank you for the change you gave me privatly

      I listened to this several times and made the change, I thank you for your thoughts

      Rick


  • Whoochi gold member
    May 16, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Looking forward to this....

  • getsbetter
    May 16, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you Lee, I will look forward to them...GETS

    • Endeavor gold member
      May 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Gets


      If you care to look

      I thank you in advance

      Rick

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