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Dual Rein

Missing image

Dual Rein

Please don’t exploit me as I come to you.
We’ll harness the stars and the mountain dew
and a colossal rainbow over trees.
As I come to you, don’t exploit me please.

Together we’ll never be obsolete,
our subjects will bow at our royal feet.
Two goddesses, soft as white heather,
never obsolete, we’ll be together.

Our power is doubled, all will concede.
We will sustain until all have been freed
and no more pain for those who are troubled.
All will concede; our power is doubled.

So allied together, we rule the world.
From our vantage-point it’s power unfurled.

 

 

 

 

Author notes

AE’Swap Sonnet

The AE’Swap Sonnet has 14 lines each line must contain 10 syllables written in iambic pentameter. The first and the fourth line of each quatrain is swapped and the ending couplet must rhyme.

Dedicated to Kristin

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Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • Swan song gold member
    May 17, 2007

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    This is very beautiful. It is difficult I think to portray a message in rhyme and meter like you do so well. This poem is just an example of your talent.


  • Whoochi gold member
    May 16, 2007

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    Again, you have spun me into amazing oblivion with your expression and form...I know I say that on almost every one of your works...but hey! Only speaking the truth as I see it...Good luck Dollface and excellent use of the word bank! Ciao


  • sunny day
    May 16, 2007

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    Bravo!!! Bravo!!! Bravo!!!

    This is absolutely heavenly. Your rhyming and rhythm superb create a soft flow with vivid imagery that is still floating before my mind's eye. I love this form you have created. Is this your second one? You never cease to amaze me with the artworks you display, such masterpieces that sooth the soul. The background accentuates it even more and I am sitting here sighing as I type this comment for you. Kudos and best wishes in the contset, it sounds golden. Love and God bless you my friend, Joyce


  • roses on fire
    May 16, 2007

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    i love this you are a beautiful writer and you astound me withe very word!!! this is great you're my mom and an amazing writer!!!

    i love you

    -faith


  • JohnnyD gold member
    May 16, 2007

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    Amera,

    this one was actually in the really coooool range, the picture fit perfectly, perfectly. Come to think of it you never did give me another poetry assignment? give up on me already??



    dad


  • azure85 gold member
    May 16, 2007

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    This is a really cool sonnet, and your story is so well told through every line. And you used a word bank too! Wowzers! Good luck in the contest!


  • painfully amazing
    May 16, 2007
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    wow..this is amazing.... i love your writing..soo much=]

    nooreo


  • PerVirtuous
    May 16, 2007

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    Well, well, well! I see it is new and improved. You never stop until you reach perfection, do you. I love it. Word bank in order? Never thought of that! You be so clever! I'd hit on you but your homepage says you are already married. Three imaginary bunnies!


  • grin and bear it
    May 16, 2007

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    Whew, this is good it let my imagination run all over. This is intresting, i've never seen a swapped sonnet before. It read well and looked great. Love the write!


  • Laura Lamarca gold member
    May 16, 2007
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    You nailed it! Thank you


    • Amera gold member
      May 16, 2007
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      Ooops thanks for the second chance. If you notice; even after I fixed the error. All the words are in the order you gave them to me.


  • PerVirtuous
    May 16, 2007
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    Dang. And I thought I had a chance to win this. But, I can't compete with the two of you. That would be a colossal mistake! *sigh* Maybe in wrestling. I could compete there! Let's all wrestle. I'll get the mazzola oil... Oh, and three bunnies for this!


  • counterculture
    May 16, 2007

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    I really like the imagery you used in the first two stanzas. They sparked my imagination. I am always in awe of sonnet writers. I do believe you could of used better imagery toward the end of the poem to spark more imagination for your reader. I enjoyed reading this poem.


  • Laura Lamarca gold member
    May 16, 2007

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    This is an excellent poem in perfect form and I love it, the picture too is fabulous. But there's a downside I can't find the word "colossal". Contest rules state that ALL words must be used in your given wordbank. Please squeeze it in somewhere.
    La x

1 - 14 of 14