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Genivev

Lying in the grass
Looking to the clouds
I hear a rasp
So faint, yet loud

Lifting up to look around
I continue to listen
But there's no more sound
Lying back and let life glisten

When I look back and find
The sky got lighter
Thoughts go flying through my mind
Now my life is getting brighter

Shocked with awe and eyes wide
Descending to earth
An angle came to find
Her true living worth


She was old and fair
Bright and cheery
But her face was white and bare
And her eyes were dark and dreary

She stayed a while
To chat and talk
Her words they traveled for a while
We soon began to lurk and walk

After time had passed
She told he must leave
Her on earth just couldn't last
Goodbye to the angle Genvieve

A contest entry

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Comments


  • Flossy
    May 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    it flows magnificintly, but there's something about your word choices that throws the reader off. some of your words just don't seem to add to the poem.


  • individuality gold member
    May 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    a good piece, i had a different comment set for this but i see you have been in and done editing thank you very much for taking the time to enter this contest and the very best of luck to you.