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In the Light Of the Crescent Moon

A howl in the night cause the monsters to wake,
blood will splatter,and cries will not be heard for
they strike swiftly, but the death is painful.

In the light of a crescent moon these monster pass as
humans,taking every town they can reach to the pit of
hell to burn their souls forever more, as the beasts continue
their raiding of the over world in the light of the crescent moon.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Lj-
    May 23, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I like this a lot. Great atmosphere, not dull at all.

    In the fourth line,
    "monster" should be plural - "monsters"

    I think you should break the last stanza up to flow better with the thoughts. Something like this:

    In the light of a crescent moon these monster pass as
    humans, /

    taking every town they can reach to the pit of hell to burn their souls forever more,/

    as the beasts continue their raiding of the over world/

    in the light of the crescent moon./



    Just a thought.


    Thank you for your entry,
    Best of luck!


  • DestinyFate
    May 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    May i ask you a question and you not be offended? It's just what I think the meaning of your poems are about.


    • Dark Whispers
      May 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      ok, what are you trying to ask,

      1. ask me what my poems are about

      2tell me what you think my poems are about

      and really I'm not offended by these at all


  • SmokinHotWhiteTiger
    May 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Incredible!

    This is such an incredibley penned poem and a very well penned poem as wlel. I absolutely loved this poem and really loved the depth and the way it flowed through out! Excellent work indeed and the pic really helped the poem alot although the poem rocked as is LOL! Good work and best of luck in the contest to yas. Signed, Tiger


  • Angel w o Wings
    May 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Very interesting

    This was nice to read and it had a story behind it, which made it interesting and fun to read. Your wording in my opinion needs some looking over. However, your on your way to being a good poet, if you learn to listen with your eyes, for they reflect what your mind and soul will feel and see.

    David


  • Silent suffering 67
    May 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    short but affective wow thnx for da great read wonderful penmanship nice flow

1 - 6 of 6