I stare at the floor around me
The beautiful crimson pool slowly spreading
Sparkling, just like the acid in your eyes
And the cyanide stars in your smile.
You are like lightning
Strikingly beautiful, yet so dangerous
And the way you have murdered my heart
Desecrated my soul, like that of a young girl
Purity lost, to eternal rape.
Your voice overpowers mine
So cold and condescending
And I know not why you seek to destroy
Everything beautiful left in me.
But since when did wrong feel so right.
The way you stare strips me naked
And I succumb to your torturous gaze.
Torn apart on the wooden floor
Splintered like the pine on which I lie.
Your rope around my neck
Leaves angry red burns, like fingerprints.
One move, one stolen breath
And you will take my life.
Slash my throat with your sword
Though my soul your words have already slain
And like the rose in your hand
Everything beautiful is left to die
Upon the cold, dark floor of the ancient castle.
My screams pierce the frigid night air
Screaming for help, each cry consumed by Death.
The moon and the storm, my only audience
Watch the spectacle, my final performance
My death-dance is met with thunderous applause
As, like the marionnette before me
You snap my strings, and I fall into a heap
Limbs bent at lifeless angles now
As I kiss the bloodstained sky.
I stare at the floor around me
The red pool dries, stains the floor.
My spirit contained within my castle, my grave.
Sweet paradise lost, as beauty dies.
My voice forever lost within these four walls
The hallowed chambers of Death and of pain
And sometimes, when the dead moon rises
Listen closely to the wind's mournful cry
And you just might hear me screaming.
Author notes
Immortal Obscurity
Just plain old morbid!
A warped version of Beauty and the Beast, written from the perspective of a victim of Erzsébet Báthory, the Bloody Countess. It's weird, but in a way that it worked, for all-intensive purposes. Thank you, and enjoy!
In a list
A contest entry
- Dark Poetry by Aeonna.
1090 points, ended March 6, 2008, 45 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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I really liked this. Congratulations on the Silver, it was well deserved. :]
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Great poem! Good luck in the contest! =)
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Great
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Wow a powerful and breathtakingly beautiful piece...look made me use long words
Fantastic poem...loved all of it, couldn't pick out a fave line if I tried. Best of luck in the contest with it 
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WOW
Oooooooooooh this dark and bloody sis... it's so good
me luv this.
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"And the way you have murdered my heart
Desecrated my soul, like that of a young girl
Purity lost, to eternal rape."
very well written, great job good luck in the contest!!!!
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"And the way you have murdered my heart
Desecrated my soul, like that of a young girl
Purity lost, to eternal rape."
My favorite lines. you captured my mood, Dark, morbid and just gory. Thank you for entering this into my contest, very original and just what I wanted to read.
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The ending was great! I think you should have kept the entire poem that way for this particular contest. But it is a great write!
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THis poem just screams with a force that demands attention.
A minor hiccup here and there: spelling (overpowers for one as it totally changes the meaning of the line).
i can't say I enjoyed reading this, because in spite of my work, i am not a Quentin Tarantino. But that does not mean I don't appreciate this piece of angst in its genre.
For it is a very decent genre piece and I thank you for entering it into my contest. -
wow laura how do you write so well. I feel like i am in ur mind
luv ya
ml -
This is brilliant, drawing your audience in and captivating them till the very last word. Again, you have captured the beauty within the darkness and painted a very amazing picture with it. The verbiage and imagery in this are outstanding, as usual. An excellent write indeed. Love always. Mum
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Intriguing
Amazing. seriously you have such a talent. Sometimes it's hard to find such great poets as yourself. It's a true pleasure to read your work. I admire your writing. I don't often say that these days either. Keep up the fantastic work!
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WOW!!! I'm running out of eloquent things to say! this is wonderful and I like it. So thank you for entertaining me.
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