I left an avocado
when that song was on the radio
no choice of slick readiness
lunch could wait without me in a lurch
going for a good sweat,
saw peeled off vinyl trampoline
no gym smell just minimal look springs
degreeing nylon not in the same league
of pros cons for this to fill cone
as shadow, nor personally
as I bounced shiny ripeness,
matching no trap
as neither tool too hard
to be leading on allergies,
while other by stainless steel utensil
is with a knife not needed
so don't think of heart surgery
even by husband's standards of careful
though material for cut elsewhere
is not for my weak mouth
so extra incentive hand clap laugh
as I won't just have cart
but less cortisol, not so teal
Author notes
use only words, please, poet
[want to develop it, but antsy to skip rainy day:
original =
left avocado
when that was on the radio
saw peeled off vinyl trampoline
as I bounced shiny ripeness,
matching no trap]
major difference from there, but it feels unfinished in smoothness and the idea's beat so to speak... but it's not flowing with delicious joy when I should get off. So, maybe another time --
heavy breath typed or typo per se?
Comments
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avocado sounds like a trap, because it's yummy with snack foods. i thought that the shiny ripeness was a clever elaboration/link to the vinyl trampoline. this seems like an everyday thing, like what one hears on the radio- because eating is something that everyone does. i was wondering if left avocado meant that the "avocado was on the lefthand side of something" or if the "avocado was left unpeeled, out in the open on top of a radio"
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I'll put original in authotr's notes for progress to be monitored!
sublimewriter (mixed messages warnings),
I am with jubilantly reinspired to straighten this out, which made so much sense but seemed too compact for public and I guess so. Sorry
avocado when very ready is one of my favorite foods but in the middle of a swallow I knew I was switching what I was reaching for when I heard a song that makes me very ready to dance... both healthy when in conducive moment for reception. The shiney oily ripeness of one in the environment to aid me was traded for no gym smell of vinnyl as that was peeled off so springs are exposed and the nylon is fairly more stable from dancing distance anyway. So, it matched as no trap of ever just getting false satisfaction fun since no fumes were occuring, as I wouldn't be with what was hard for allergies on stainless steel utensils. And I got a good sweat then!
I'll dabble in editing...but thanks for showing how well you read with what I made available like "avocado was on the lefthand side of something" or if the "avocado was left unpeeled, out in the open on top of a radio" when it was close as nearby to be dropped so to speak for lunch or spontaneous energy!
11:42 strongly remembering how eyes can adjust to find few stars shining bright in tonight's sky,
Carolyn
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