Images of pain flash horror in the mind
Blinded by the suffocating darkness
The cries for help bounce off the walls
Echoing insanity and rattling the bones
Chaos errupts as dementia claims the thoughts
Of a troubled soul fighting for breath
As darkness claims another victim
A contest entry
- Seven Lines by Lj-.
300 points, ended May 27, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Very dark.
I like the description and enforcing atmosphere of chaos.
Thank you for entering,
Good luck!
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i know what your getting at, but i think your word choice could be a bit more creative, as it is it seems a bit cliche, you have something going, perhaps a few tweaks will make this perfect, but it is only my oppinion
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Very vivid description here! Well penned!
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