At the end I expected there to be
Something like nirvana or a peaceful place
But now I look down on my body from this lofty airspace
And wonder how this happened to me.
It isn't fair that I should die
So young, but so many things went awry
To put me up here in the sky.
A contest entry
- Seven Lines by Lj-.
300 points, ended May 27, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Lots of feeling. Clear mood.
Thank you for your entry,
Best of luck!
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Such a sad, sweet poem telling the darkness of death. I found the rhyme scheme you used very interesting. In fact, I do not think it hindered the flow in any way, but gave an extra touch. The feelings expressed are done so very well - a moving poem with a strong message.
DancingRed.


