I see my miserable self
Falling apart
A rotting piece of wood
Crumbling wet pieces
Insecurity is eating away
At my broken heart
Only a few crumbs remain
A jumble of lines
On a parachute
Dropping to the earth
I will crash
Be destroyed and forgotten
Faster and with blinding speed
I am about to meet my end
Then you reach your arms
Out and around my life
Saving me
Falling apart
A rotting piece of wood
Crumbling wet pieces
Insecurity is eating away
At my broken heart
Only a few crumbs remain
A jumble of lines
On a parachute
Dropping to the earth
I will crash
Be destroyed and forgotten
Faster and with blinding speed
I am about to meet my end
Then you reach your arms
Out and around my life
Saving me
Author notes
It's so cool how God saves us amidst those hard times. How we can feel His hands in our lives, guiding us and comforting us. He is there when we are happy, and He is there when we are falling and when we believe that all hope is gone, those arms come out and catch us before we hit the ground.
A contest entry
- show me what it's like by risewiththesmoke.
900 points, ended June 11, 2007, 12 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - My Broken Heart Lies Bleeding by SchizoChic.
600 points, ended February 29, 2008, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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This is a wonderful Poem.. I just love it..
May the spirit flow in your veins...
Your friend in Poetry JackReed3

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Nice...
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I have been there, done that myself, and it is amazing how God can always pull us through, no matter what the situation. I definitely admire your spirituality, and I believe that religion should never be used as a last resort, but throughout, as a guiding light in the darkness. All the best to you, and may God always be with you.
Love and light always,
Laura
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"A rotting piece of wood / Crumbling wet pieces" a great metaphor. i love it, as it is original and i had never thought of it nor heard it used before. i love the flow in this piece and the imagery. it all just goes together without any awkwardness. a great write!
~bee

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Excellent
Wonderfully descriptive images. It brings energy to your poem. The feelings are effective and dramatic. Good luck in the contest.

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your poetry always has a sort of sad hopefulness to it. this reminds me of a poem I wrote (not to sound completely self absorbed) about standing in the sand, wondering why I am slipping forward, when there is always the Rock nearby for me to stand on.
Even more than the form and style of your poetry I appreciate your openness to express how God makes you feel, how you connect with Him and that's what I think makes the creative expression of poetry as a Christian important to me, and it seems the same for you, too.
I am inspired by your continuing trust in Him. Please, keep it up, keep writing!


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i really like this a lot. it has great flow and doesn't seem forced at all. the imagery is great and i love how all the stanzas reinforce each other. the last part is a great conclusion, as well. good luck!


1 - 7 of 7







