I'm falling away from the pain
the blood drips silently to the ground
my wrist lays limp upon my side
as my tears create a crying sound.
I hate my life I hate my death but what can I do?
My heart was broken into thousands of shards
black and tainted as they really are.
Save me my love
why do you just stand and watch?
My life slips away cause I thought for sure you would save me.
They all said I tried to kill myself
but they are wrong, oh so wrong.
I really died I never tried
it was you.
You made me pick up that razor
you made me peel across my flesh
You made me strip away my innocence
you made me fall in love with my shadow
perverted and twisted like the nightmares of my past.
My body aches it hurts not from the stitches in my arm
or the restraints upon my chest,
but the fact that I know
that you left me dying.
Forever I waited to find someone like you
and now I wish that darkness would close in and take this all away.
I am lost and alone because you hate me
because your sad every-time you not with me
but yet you still hate me.
And so I lay inside my mind
and dream about your demise
as I continue living
even though i'm dead.
I am full of shame that I fell in love with you
she who is death incarnate.
She who is not a human but a beast
a creature who stood and loved to watch
as my life essence dripped away.
They let me go,
and so this time I tried
you saw me and watched again
as...I...died.....
Author notes
I have not ever actually been able to cut myself. I have tried soo many times. And I have watched people cut themselves over and over again, I sat and tried to stop them over and over again but they never listened.
I try to start,a nd no one is there to make me stop. Thats all I wanted for the longest time, I didn't want to start I wanted someone to stop me.
and so I die emotionally everyday of my life as my closest friends and those who I love with every ounce of my very being, they cut themselves to death.
I dont know what I would do if one of them died. But I do know that in the least it woud be my fault, wether it was in reality or not, it would be my fault.
zrist was on rodi hwethra ther fusa fearron swommu athwila til onum ik that oh bih.
adeui.
--Lucian Adonis, The Apathetic Fallacy
A contest entry
- deppressed/suicide/hurt/lost love/cutting(SA, SI) by Felix BlackHeart.
375 points, ended May 13, 2007, 30 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - contest!!! (no rules) by nobodys-girl.
1700 points, ended July 5, 2007, 44 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Be honest, tell me what you think.
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
-
You have never cut yourself??? I didn't know that!!!
-
your poem.......has now words to say. it was just, a really good piece, I really like the formatting of words. frewrite is the best I think. gets more emotions out that way. this poem just made me think of how other besides me write in free verse too. I lvoe this poem alot. thanx for entering!
-
I find it hard to comment because i recently lost a cousin to suicide. To read these words is to almost read his thoughts. AUGHHHHHH. sorry.
-
This is my favorite poem I have ever read!!! It is so powerful! And deep!! But unfortunately I have the same problem!! I have the guys name I love in my arm right now!! And I still love him to this day!! i could never forget him!!! Youi should read some of mine!! They are not even half as good as yours!! Give me a few poiiunters please!! You amaze me withyour wrioting and I would love to be able to capture the reader like you can!!!
-
Oh dear! This is so very powerful and so dark. You opened the closet of darkness, selected the cloak of pain and you wear it well. Poetically and artistically you have created a masterpiece. I then read your notes; philosophically you are looking at life in a negative manor. Life is too short for that, try this: stop, smell the roses, be amazed and awed at the beauty of creation then become one with it, I can’t wait to wake up every day, I don’t want to miss one moment of what life has to offer.
Love,
Amera
-
This is insane I cant believe people cut themselves isnt there a better way to cry out for help? This poem was excellant maybe you should let your friends read it. It is very dramatic, and puts a good message out there. I personally have never know anyone that cuts themselves. So please do not be offenfed by this comment. :
Adding your comment:
1 - 6 of 6
