you are Fall
with your newly
colored hair
detached from
your mother's
breasts
too good for
expired milk
and rotten meat
you set
your own
table now
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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This is good stuff. I can see I need to add a favorite.
Garrison
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wow.. I really really like this piece.. the wording is amazing. Great write.
Peace to you, Jetleena -
Simple is best. It is amazing how you have only given us the essence in this little poem. It brings to my mind the rites of passage we all need to go through, and the beauty of nature also. Very nice.
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Umm I think this is my favorite of the three you just showed me. I like the imagery of fall and leaves. Plus, I have this thing about meat. It invokes odd ideas and moods with me. Odd yes, but you captured the mood well and I like the different format approach. The three lined stanzas and diagonal slant look nice.
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Thank you baby. I like meat too.. especially yours.
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I love this, it says so much and well. My first reaction reading this poem was, wish I could write like this.
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My god man..
You are so amazing..i love you bunches! -
AAAH such amazing imagery here!
poignant, concise. striking and beautiful.
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thank you so much my dear!
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