Taking another trip, walking in the(s)park
Hit another round of this i/n/sane decline.
Wish I knew a better way to feed this,
a better way to fix this,
a better way to /k/i-l-l this(self).
Something that might make me better,
So I'll take it one more time,
kick it one more time,
make it one more time,
plead with it one/more/time/
To finally take me away.
But it won't listen...
will it?
No I won't
(not that I can)
Wish I could be alright,
not have to rely on this,
not to rely on you.
Author notes
My second attempt at dirty pretty....might work, might not. Critism is always valued...might could be longer, could be shorter....maybe later.
x.one last fix.x
A contest entry
- The Dirty Pretty Contest by SchizoChic.
425 points, ended September 29, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Great job Best of luck.
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Reminds me a lot of a dream I had. Although I don't take 'drugs' as such, I have taken cannabis once and I regularly drink, so I know the dizzy and whacky feelings you can get. Nicely put.
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'Wish I could be alright,
not have to rely on this,
not to rely on you.'
loved that last bit =]
♥ -
Interesting poem... Better than mine. I own't even attempt to write like this.. great job.
~Kitten~





