darkness
pain
it all seems to consume me
i can see the light
my goals
my dreams
there so close
but not close enough.
i fight
i always have
but as a victim of routine
i give up
time after time
the opportunity was there.
the ability to achieve
happiness
relief
but i never did
i never could.
not anymore
no longer will i live in this darkness
the obsession
my own disgust
i break the barrior
you see
there is one difference
from then to now
you...
you who understands
who gives
who cares
never was their one who had been there
who had made it through the darkness
who was willing to take me with them.
but then there was you.
A contest entry
- 0 by Lauren Noir.
850 points, ended June 2, 2007, 27 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
Wonderful
I loved the short little lines with one words, it built up the meaning and tension
You described everything brillintly
A nice little story too
Well done
Thank you for this entry
-
Wow I can relate to this A LOT. great job riting it I think its one of your bests. good job luv ya
~Chelbelle
-
Interesting turn of events, at first you love and pity the reader and then you hate them for how cruel they are.. anyway, great writing
~WU -
-
i honestly dont see tht.
i wrote it as though i am doing sumthing, idk a bad addiction of sorts, time after time i try and stop but i cant, but then the reader comes along, and they save me -
-
I can see that, too.
it gives it a whole new perspective, and thanks for sharing..
~WU
-
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 5 of 5
