The only thing other than my heart
That i would risk for you is everything
I only want to be with you.
I want to live forever
In the moments that i spend with you.
I don't want to have to know
That your away from me
Or know that i missed something,
Anything about you,
Because i know that no one else
Will ever know me the way you do.
No one else will look.
But i could look into your eyes forever.
When you look at me,
I feel you through your eyes,
And when you touch me
I hear you through your heart.
If life were a movie,
I want you to be my hero.
At any moment, any place
My hair messed up,
In old jeans and a T-shirt,
Looking my worst,
I love to know
That when you look at me,
You still see me as beautiful.
You are the wings of my spirit
I only need to be with you.
It's the need to run away with you
when things go right,
With you in my happiest moments,
and in my greatest times of need.
To speak to you keeps my world spinning,
And my heart thinking
And my head feeling.
I only long to be with you;
Without you, I could never feel
Anything like this
Author notes
Option 4
< **Pickles rock my sox off >
A contest entry
- Options! Pick and Go! by Onyx-Rose.
400 points, ended May 24, 2007, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Lengthy, but wonderful.
The whole "t-shirt and jeans line" is tremendously cliche....but the rest of the poem is extremely original. the bit about "when you look at me, I feel you through your eyes, and when you touch me, I hear you through your heart." the parallelism and the mis-matched senses make it very interesting. i love it. =D -
Interesting
A good poem, definately but I kept on getting distracted by the spelling mistakes. I would prefer you to correct them but since I didn't put it in the rules I can't really put any of the blame on you. Interesting and a little intriguing. My favorite line, because it's so unique and I've never seen anything like it thrown into a poem so perfectly;
"If life were a movie, I want you to be my hero." Well done. Keep up the good work. Good luck in my contest and thanks for entering. God bless.
Onyx -
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i'm trying to fix mistakes, but don't know if i missed any, maybe alot. i'm sorry about that, though. if there's any that stick out, please tell me.
thanks for letting me know.
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