Swallow my emptiness
Shadows of the sweet dreams
Swept out beneath my grasp
Shed skin tossed out to sea
Succulent empty space
Saved here for you my love
Solely for you to fill.
Author notes
There has to be sacrifice to live in any paradise
A contest entry
- Pleiades Picture Competition V by ShelleyA.
525 points, ended May 19, 2007, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Nice title. Perfect form. Good flow and tone. Deep expression of emotion. Good word choice and alliteration. Thank you for your entry. Shelley
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I like this, I like how terse it is...short and sweet. The only thing is, it just doesnt seem finished. Maybe just put a last phrase or line there at the end?
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