Watch my shady footsteps fade away
Into the bleak world this day
'Cause you can't tell me who to be
I live my own life my own way
You know you have no right to say
That I'm your slave, not really me
My life's path is dark and deep
But even if I fall into eternal sleep
You know you can't stand seeing me run free
Though Hell itself might bar the way
I can't live imprisoned each day
"Tell Wind and Fire where to stop, but don't tell me"
Author notes
"Tell Wind and Fire where to stop but don't tell me."
-Charles Dickens
A contest entry
- Quote Inspiration - Win a One Month Silver Membership! by Sharcu.
450 points, ended June 2, 2007, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The real World.......prewrites allowed so ENTER by trace3grls.
525 points, ended November 24, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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great write well done....
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OHHHH I loved this. I completely agree!!!!


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Aaaaaaaahhh. The last line didn't really fit to me..but other than that I deeply enjoyed it.
I am sorry I'm not writing a good comment for you..my mind is kind of blah. -
Commentary
Encapsulation was the key player in this write. The way you embraced that untold story of yourself, then combined it by using the quote as the finishing line really draws the reading audience in because you took your hidden emotions and ran with this piece. As far as grammar is concerned, normally I'd 'pounce' but this time for the reasons Ive previously stated. Thank you for entering, Good luck, and keep penning



