When I stroke your face,
I think of how much of a disgrace
I've become
When I look into your eyes,
I think of how much I'm crying inside
When I kiss your soft lips,
I think of how much I've lost
When I'm with you laying,
I think of who I'm betraying
Copyright
{c} 2007
Hannah Duffin
{All Rights Reserved}
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
Wonderful and deep
Stunning writing. I love this. This is powerful. I love the 'twist' at the end. The rhyme is brilliant as well, also it flows along brilliantly.

-
-
aww thanks
YAY! now I'm happy, ha ha. Thanks for the kind words, best of luck
-HD
-
-
Second line needs a correction...disgrace is what you meant I think. This sounds like a pen of a love triangle. Betrayal and sadness. Well done. Hugs, Kelly

-
-
-this comment is an accident-
-
ha ha
Yea, a love triangle! I hope that other corner goes away soon! ha ha ha, well it's gonna be fine for me because I've learned to deal with it. Best of luck with poetry and life!
-HD
-
1 - 5 of 5



