got to keep active or the thoughts will creep in. feel it inside.the dread.
whats round the corner?
you don't know me enough.man you think you know it all.
its all happening now and we don't know what to do.I'm afraid its coming for you too.
hide from it and blindly enjoy the day but its taken me away.
like a swarm of pain.
In a list
- A Hard Rock and Heavy Metal Lovers Gro group list • next in list
A contest entry
- Give me your pain by wolfcub.
600 points, ended June 1, 2007, 79 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Regrets, We all have them. by Lord Merlynn.
300 points, ended May 27, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Sick and Twisted 6 by Acidanthra.
525 points, ended September 5, 2007, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your BEST Prewrite! - For Mike [degarmo] - by Never Fall in Love.
950 points, ended October 29, 2007, 130 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
-
this is very abstract. i like how it could be interpreted in many ways.
-
Capitalization.
I am not strict on punctuation and grammer but these full common letters are what annoys me the most. I'd also suggest that the poem is revised and put into smaller phrases.
Thank you for entering and good luck in the contest
Never ♥ -
Just a quick comment to all, I have been rather sick lately with fever and all, so I am going to give this judging only a couple of days, to see if my mind can get back to focus. I want to be able to enjoy each and every entry in this contest. It is very important to me.So, whatever you do, don't remove it, I will hand out awards... Thanks, Acidanthra
-
Wow! I like it and am kind of lost for words.
-
Great. I think you deserve a place. You have depicted your emotion well through your words.
'got to keep active or the thoughts will creep in.'
This was my favorite line, it really drew me in and read the rest of the poem. Top stuff
-
SHOWS MUCH PAIN MAN MUCH PAIN.
I like the line.
"Its all happening now and i dont know what to do. Im afraid its coming for you too."
I really love that line it scares me makes me hope im not in danger of serious illness.
Hope you win the contest man.
El
x x x
-
good write and good luck in the contest.
Adding your comment:
1 - 7 of 7
