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what happend

whats wrong with me
why did he have to do those things
why did i have to beaten in an orphanage
why dose that have to be my first memory
i don't even know who my parents are
i don't know anything of my past
i feel lost as if there is a chapter
that hasn't been written in my book of life


why do i come to a family that doesn't understand
when i say i love a boy
and they say i don't


why did i have to be molested
in a store that i loved to go to


I've been so scarred of life now
i just want to die
i  dont like looking at the people
that i let down and disappointed


but i still take the drink
because its the only thing that helps
yes its bad for me
oh but its so good


i cant stop
the pain becomes to strong
i have to relive it
i have to punish my self
for what i did
even if it isn't my fault


i still have to make those cuts
or take that drink
or not eat that food
i have to feel the pain
i have to be ashamed
i have to feel the hate
to live in this world

Author notes

this is how i feel. so i hope you enjoy it. <3

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Emotionless-brat
    May 17, 2007

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    wwwwooowwwwzzeeerrrsss

    wow very good poem....really sorry that all that shit had to happen to u i kinda get were ur coming from, imy sis and i were in foster care for a while, she was raped in one of the homes it is not an thing to talk about much less happen to it is fucked up i hope who ever hurt goes dtright down to hell...well maybe not cuz im going thre and i dont want to see that person ill have to kick there ass..lol...i love you and this poem...lots of lovexxxxxxx


  • MoonlightBeam
    May 3, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Another great poem, almost made me cry again. Wow! I hope your doing ok.


  • Para-Dressage
    May 3, 2007

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    this is alot like my own life,htis piece is beautifully crafted and i can tell that the emotions conveyed are one hundred percent real. nicely done!

    ~Valen~


  • TwistedVampire666
    May 2, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    really good,i hope u win,has all this acully happened to you?wow i couldnt image it,i mean sum of has happened to me n thats how i feel but,ah never mind im rambling,anyway really good poem!


  • Twins 4 me
    May 2, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I am so sorry that you have had so many hardships in your life. My prayers go out to you. God bless.


  • BeautifulDisaster9
    May 2, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Whew.

    "i feel lost as if there is a chapter
    that hasn't been written in my book of life"
    First off, that really hooked me. I could feel your pain, which is what I designed this contest for. I am so sorry that you had to go through all that. It's terrible. I know what it is like to need to feel hate, whether it be self-hate, or others hate, to keep living, and it's really tough. Nice job.

    Best of luck and thanks for entering.

    <3BeautifulDisaster9

1 - 6 of 6