Paper walls, traumatized
by screams bleeding through,
shell-shocking this room.
Shouted shrapnel pierces pillow,
stirring knight within.
Apathy upon my shoulder
whispers “it’s family business.”
Lipstick underlines bruises,
daring stares to speak.
Alibi, weighed, practiced,
delivered; mummy! Trip! Stairs!
Behind-the-hand explanations,
that it’s family business.
Tear cling-film illusions
that stifle freedoms air,
become a mercenary
in your public, private war.
But I could never be a hero
in family business.
I saw the gurney altar
draped in black-plastic shroud,
children’s stony faces
pinning guilt to my blind-eye,
and from routine questions,
I could hear disappointments tone
asking, “Just how long should it stay
family business.”
Author notes
Ispiration From "Family Business" - Derek W. Dick (Fish)
Colin Marschall
A contest entry
- Battle Of The Sexes (Invite Only) by Cupcrazy.
1500 points, ended May 9, 2007, 15 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Once More I speak to unsilence the issue by x-Black-Butterfly-x.
6000 points, ended March 8, 2008, 42 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ABUSE - looking for poems to be published :) by DramaQueen469.
550 points, ended October 25, 2008, 58 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
-
WOW. Just... WOW. I am so blown away by this piece, unfortunately "it's family business" is still the midset of so many people. Thankyou very much for entering this piece.
~*~DramaQueen469~*~ -
this is perfect for the contest uncle I say go ahead and enter it
your words speak so much truth in them and the flow is powerful. well done uncle
-
Your words are so true sweetie!! This one went straight to my heart.
-
Excellent
This is another excellent piece, stark imagry and the flow and form are just amazing. I loved this piece, it is filled with emotion and totally captivated me. Thanks for this marvelous entry. Hugs, Bunny
-
Consistent, vivid war imagery. Excellent!! Stark scenes. Good study of self. Powerful words and steady flow. Emotionally sitrring. A "whole package" poem.
-
WOW
The intensity is amazing and the emotion and dark aura is truly riveting...
It is always such a unique experience visiting you, my talented Bro..
Lynda
-
Excellent
great literature in understandable words and phrases; my favorite Supreme Court Justice Robert Jackson described it as "using the simple saxon that doth pierce like an arrow"; so you have done this so well here, no need for a dictionary or a thesaurus, just a hankerchief and a prayer for understanding...PK
-
stirring knight >like in armor or night as in day or night?
A very good point wou make with this write. Thank you for sharing. Rose -
-
As in knight > armor, reference to the knight in shining armor that comes to save the damsel in distress
-
-
this is really good and really shocking it seems to be blunt and not trying to hide the pain which is really good best of luck in their contest keep writin j
-
Vivid portrait of a dark reality.
Its sobering to read of the hidden abuse and conflict within the family home, concealed as family business. Powerful lines: The entire stanza one draws me in. (Line five: knight or night?); Lines 6 & 7: Apathy upon my shoulder whispers, "its family business." Very good. The "its family business refrains all are powerful. Put a colon instead of semicolon in line 10, perhaps? Capitalize "mummy"? Interesting observation in lines 17 and 18--there are no heros. When we do the right thing, we hurt the family, when we do nothing, we hurt the family worse. What's the "gurney altar"? Is this a family member being carried out to the ambulance? Or are you alluding to a death? Again, good work, tough subject matter -
-
Line 5 - knight, as in the one who shows up to save the damsel
"gurney altar", the thing they use to take away dead bodies .. the altar part I thought would convay images of neighbours standing around with heads bowed watching the body go by .. maybe its a bit to obscure
-
-
WOW!
This poem gave me goosebumps, I felt your pain. This hit very close to home for me and brought back some memories from my past. Thanks for opening a door for me to go through to start my healing process.
Leslie
-
Wow!
Adding your comment:
1 - 14 of 14
