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Lost Hope

Just discovered,
a slowly dripping leak.
Not a new fissure,
just a vessel that's weak.

What was overflowing,
now almost dry.
Leak or evaporation,
either would apply.

Hope was the substance,
that now is mostly gone.
Maybe is was weakening,
the vessel all along.

If only there was a place,
where nothing ever died.
There we'd meet to put an end,
to all the tears we've cried.

But now a dark void,
is all that remains.
Empty is the vessel,
with the rusty tear stains.

Author notes

"I will meet you where nothing dies."

Zen Koan

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Heart Sutra
    May 16, 2007

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    The rusty tear was something new in a poem. Thank you for sharing it with the contest.


  • AJ Morelli gold member
    May 13, 2007

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    wow this is a dark piece, was looking for the silver lining but didn't find it... thanks for the entry


    al


  • kareneisenlord gold member
    May 3, 2007

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    This was lovely! I thought the metaphor of the leaking vessel and it eventually emptying and the tears drying leaving "rusty stains" was amazing. Very well written, and deeply thought out. The hope behind this stanza is inspirational;

    "If only there was a place,
    where nothing ever died.
    There we'd meet to put an end,
    to all the tears we've cried."

    I hope to meet you there one day, my friend! This was a very deep and compassionate write. The flow and rhyme/rhythm of the poem is very nice also. Best wishes in the contest!


  • Desire gold member
    May 2, 2007
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    Wow!!

    Powerful piece penned and could not help but feel sadness
    which is what the piece intended as called for in the contest~
    Beautifully written!
    Wow!!

    Thank You for sharing this!
    Best wishes to You in the contest
    Many blessings too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


  • slipperssun gold member
    May 2, 2007

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    this is a fantastic write... something that we could all relate to i am sure...
    if you ever find this place send me a message...lol i'm coming with you
    cheers
    Jen

  • June-bug
    May 2, 2007

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    excellent

    Fantastic Job, someday we all shall meet where nothing ever dies. This reminds me of a gospel song I use to sing with my dad and at church when I was young. "To Canaan's land I'm on my way where the soul never dies, while I get the message of lost hope and departure from your write, I also find within your words hope cause there is that place where death is no longer, JESUS. your words are thought provoking, reminding one to be thankful for the gift of life given at this moment. Thanks for giving me a fresh start to a fresh day.


  • eyesofanangel524
    May 2, 2007

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    Beautifully written. Great hope and understanding in this one. Your heart always so pure. Can relate to this in a sense. Hit close to home. Thank you for sharing. Best of luck to you in the contest. Dawn


  • Cannonsfire
    May 1, 2007
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    Tears can be sad but sometimes joyful, I hope yours are only of joy *hug*


  • Whoochi gold member
    May 1, 2007

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    OHHHHHHHHH deeply profound and sad...wouldn' that be great where nothing ever dies...I think that may be called heaven but while we are still on this earthly ground, its all too sad for those of us left here!

1 - 9 of 9