I left my body once.
While sleeping I awoke
sat up and swung my legs
out of the bed;
then looking down
I saw myself asleep.
I know I had a choice
because the me
that was a shadow
wondered what to do;
to walk or not?
'To be or not to be?'
I watched myself
asleep.
with quiet calm.
No bright lighted tunnel
beckoned.
Only darkened room,
where my transparent
shadow sat,
deciding what to do;
although I knew
I couldn't walk away.
'I'd best get back'
I thought,
and lay, again,
inside my sleeping self.
Three decades on
I know
I had a choice,
that night
and chose to stay.
No doubt there'll come
another day,
when choice or not,
I'll walk away.
A contest entry
- Did deep into your honesty and find YOU by Janice M Pickett.
450 points, ended May 14, 2007, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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Wow...
Do you know, I had a dream as a 17 year-old that I died of a massive heart attack (felt the excrutiating pain and everything). The post-death experience was unbelievable... I'm amazed it didn't spur me into believing in a divine being because it was so vivid and incredible!
Anyhow, this piece was fascinating and a well set out experience.
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Interesting poem, interesting context and interesting format. I'm interested in the event you're describing, and Intrigue is always good in a poem, but I think it needs some work
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wow
I really liked this one.I'm not sure why,I guess the way you wrote it really stands out to me.Good Job. :]
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It takes an experience such as portrayed in the poem to be able to get a serious thought on your life - a coma, a serious sickness, etc. Makes you realize the brevity of life, and that we should be very cautious and ask God's wisdom in our everyday choices we make. A good reminder to value the precious gift of God called LIFE.
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What an interesting notion. I have had such choices myself, but never in so 'metaphysical' a way. The rhyme scheme is problematic, it seems you randomly rhyme or not at a whim, though you could just be using a form I am not familiar with. I think if you tightened up the form this could be very good. I like the ending. This has a lovely sense of free will/determinism being synthesised - the ultimate act of free will and the ultimate destruction of that will.
Nice one,
K. F.
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Excellent
I had an out of body experience many years ago as a result of a heart attack. It turned out to be the most profound event in my life. From that moment on my life changed. My outlook was transformed and I finally understood what is truly important in life. My eventual entry into the ministry can be traced directly to that event. I know what lies beyond this life because I have seen it.
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Oh, this is very moving. The way you describe it as you looking at yourself and making the conscious choice to stay with you is really vivid. Well written, glad you made the choice you did.
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Wonderful write. The poem is awesomely written and excellently detailed. I am deeply moved. Good Luck in your contest.
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Beautiful write here
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Thank you for the entry
This contest will bring out some powerful stuff. Thanks for being part of it. Your poem moved me. It flowed beautifully and gave me shivers. Great work.
Hugs
Jan -
I am so touched by you sharing such an intimate experience, especially, because I have had a similar one quite recently ... in the middle of the night, during a long and difficult illness, I was clearly asked by a very gentle and caring voice, if I wished to stay or take the opportunity to leave (through suffocation) ... time stood still, as I gathered my spirit and replied : "but if I leave I have to come back, leftover karma to dissolve" ... my goal of self-realization and liberation from illusion and ego not having achieved yet, I decided to stay and accomplish what I came here for ...
I don't know if this makes sense to you, but I felt like sharing it with you ... I have read a book that clearly mentions those "doorways" that we are offered several times in our life, and each time, we have the choice to leave or to stay (the latest book by neale donald walsch called "home with god - in a life that never ends")
many blessings to you,
graceful lady,
maa
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I believe it maa coz it's happened to me 3 times since 1997. I too chose to stay.
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wow, and I thought I was "crazy" and just imagining all this ... strangely, I am unaware of such a choice before that, but it seems that we actually get them regularly throughout our life ... maybe now, we're just a bit more aware and conscious about such happenings ?
marion
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A captivating narrative poem and as well fascinating! I assume you are referring to NDE. The body has amazing capacities to disassociate in time and reality that the mind does not fully understand. I read a lot about it and testimonies as well. Still a long way to go
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