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Natural Serenity

Listen to the rushing water
As it's silken ribbons
Cascade down the rock face.

Hear the rushing wind
As it's soft carresses
Gently shake the leaves in the trees.

Listen to the laughter
As the ribbons slide
Over the rocks at my feet.

Feel the spray
As the ribbons vaporize
Silken clouds float across this Eden.

Feel the fur
As the magnificent white tiger
Moves beneath my hand.

Feel the peace
As the beauty of this place
Brings out such perfect
Serenity.

Author notes

I'm not a paid member so I don't think I can get the pic countrybabe made for me to show, but I really loved it. Here's the link for it. http://s89.photobucket.com/albums/k237/Countrybabe26/?action=view¤t=Backgroundformythological-mouses-1.gif In an attempt to still show nicely I posted a waterfall background.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • janejainejayne gold member
    May 17, 2008

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    Brava!

    You captured the tranquility of nature when it is calm and beautiful and you did not need a picture to do it! The words you wrote painted the picture for you! Wonderful!


  • Girl In The War
    May 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    There is a certain...meditative nature to this poem? I feel as though this could be read well people are meditating and bring on a very serene feeling. You bring about a beautiful scene with your poem, pulling the reader (or at least me) into this peaceful place.


  • Candy6
    May 3, 2007
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    beautiful poem. I use 3 lines on my 2 poems that I wrote. I don't hardly write haiku chain at all.


  • myrataal gold member
    May 3, 2007

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    A very auditive write ...

    The repetition is a visualization of the never-ending cascade. I also loved the ribbon metaphor, for it reminded me that water is our lifeline to health and purity.

    Well done!

    Love
    Myra

    Ps Thank you for reading my work; I appreciate your comment.


  • FifthDove gold member
    May 1, 2007

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    This poem has such a calming effect that I feel as though I need a nap now, a wonderful poem Best wishesDove


  • countrybabe gold member
    April 30, 2007

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    Nicely Done

    This piece is very nicely done. Well done on writing a great poem to go with the background I created for you. Thank you for your entry and good luck.

    Keep writing

    Countrybabe

1 - 7 of 7