Sweet sensations
Origin of my temptation
You call me provocative,
While you are my provocation.
Turkish delight
Make me feel right
Without you I am lonesome at night
I desire you from twilight to daylight
forever and eternally to be present on my side.
A contest entry
- Blank Cheque by sca.
777 points, ended November 1, 2007, 48 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - This Heart Of Mine. by TheSpiralGenerator.
750 points, ended July 4, 102 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Oguz is so very fortunate!
Absolutely beautiful poem. Wish everyone was as fortunate as you and Oguz!
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I don't think the write is particularly original, not that anything is in this post modern era, but there's a lot of "telling", not a lot of "showing", and the flow/meter seems to have been rearranged for the sake of the rhyme.
It's a beautiful thing for you to write specifically for someone to put across or clarify your feelings, but in the scheme of things as a poem you could perhaps put in some more metaphor and sensory description?
=> Jess -
Excellant/romantic/memorable
A very fine write indeed. -
THIS IS SO SWEET!
A lovely little write saying just how much you miss the one who owns your heart.
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amazing...i'm so glad you're writing again
how've you been ? i've been out of units so i cant call or sms u but tell me did the package arrive in one piece ? did you like the pictures ?
love
serge
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