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Hypnotizing Hell Fire

Deep within the depths of my mind,
Linger the most terryfing thoughts of them all.
Hate and rage flow through my veins,
Bubbling with anger, making me flush.


I'm here tonight to make you suffer,
I'm turning the tables on the role of the victim.
Becoming a ruthless, cold hearted killer,
Smiling with glee as I stab my knife into your heart.


I twist out the blood covered blade,
And thrust it down each time digging deeper.
The sweet taste of revenge is better than anyother,
The look of fear and death on your face is priceless.


I've been waiting for this moment my whole life,
Your disgusting blue eyes are turning black.
As I hear you gasping desperatly for air,
I feel no pitty, not an ounce of shame for my actions.


My knife delicatly cuts the straightest line,
Seperating the flesh from your neck.
Hypnotizing hell fire still burning in my eyes,
I stare at your perverted lifeless body knowing, I'm finaly safe.




Author notes

This is a poem that i wrote about killing someone who really hurt me alot...its not very good and not what i usually write about but i hope its okay..good contest and have fun judging..

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Comments

1 - 15 of 15

  • Bruised.Roses
    May 24, 2007

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    hey babe I never noticed I didn't comment on this piece...I really like it the anger poured like blood from the page and stained me in it's perfection. it was a wonderful write....keep it up!
    xoxoxox
    tash


  • SmokinHotWhiteTiger
    May 23, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Incredible

    This is all round one of the ebst gruesom awesome dark poems I have ever rea dby any poet. I really admire how deep you get into your poems espically dark ones. Any ways I really liked how you use the blad eof the knife through out your poem and the imagery you paint within. Excellent work and very well deserved gold trophy you won wtg on that. keep up the good work


  • Ale E
    May 23, 2007

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    Like your previous comment it was very intense and totally got my attention. I thought it was great. It had a good flow and overall great write.

  • luvmypoetry
    May 23, 2007

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    Very intense

    You have an amazing ability to really create a scene through your writing, making it visible to all its readers. It's really sad that you had to feel like this about someone but like everyone i guess we have people that we wish we could stab and stab until we indeed stare at their perverted lifeless body knowing we're finally safe! Well written, great flow of words, excellent emotional expression. Love the title too, very deep, dark and powerful. Loved it


  • SmokinHotWhiteTiger
    May 22, 2007

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    Incredible!

    I twist out the blood covered blade,
    And thrust it down each time digging deeper.
    The sweet taste of revenge is better than anyother,
    The look of fear and death on your face is priceless.

    I really loved those lines because that really drew me in and I can visualize this happening and it sucks that you were hurt but you desperately wanted to do that to this perosn who hurt you. Incredible imagery and just an all round awesome job. congrats on Gold Trophy its a well deserved one.


  • Synthetic-Nightmare
    May 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    WOW

    This one is deep and very powerful, ha, i have someone i really REALLY want to do that to. Hmph, to bad murder is illegal.....ANOTHER GREAT WRITE! KUDOS

  • xUnseenLovex
    May 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Very nice, some amazing imagery. Some really strong emotion in this.
    Well Done,
    Keep It Up,
    xUseenLovex


  • Poetdontknowit
    April 30, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    NICE

    WOW! You have really showed me your emotional side, I like it.
    POETDONTKNOWIT


  • darkshadows21
    April 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this was really well done. i liked it. you really showed strong emotion and feelings in this piece!
    great job!


  • Xx Morbid Beauty xX
    April 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    great job hun

    wow chrissy this was amazing truly fantastic... i love your style of writing its always changing in good ways tho so its great... keep up the great work
    and good luck in the contest
    <3 Krissy

  • galkimba
    April 30, 2007
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    WOW! That's pretty dark M Angel! MY daughter could write like this...This person clearly caused the deepest pain you've ever had. I'm so sorry for you!! I felt every thrust as you stabbed him, with each 'stab' you wrote. I sincerely hope that this was the


    • XXBrunettexBarbieXX
      April 30, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      well thank you so much for this amazing comment, and I'm glad you liked it, this person, my brother, did cause me alot of pain and torment half my life and it did feel good to let this out......again thank you
      ~Chrissy~


  • Broken Machine
    April 30, 2007

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    oOo. Awesome! I really liked the last line, "I stare at your perverted lifeless body knowing, I'm finaly safe." I can kind of relate to that without the like murdering him part. lol. Great poem! Good luck in the contest!


  • XxMysticalFantasyxX
    April 30, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Oh yeah applause haha


  • XxMysticalFantasyxX
    April 30, 2007

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    Wow....this poem was really really well done..I really liked it thank you for entering my contest Good luck hehe and once again wow..freaky haha

1 - 15 of 15