Lent toward true comeliness perfect form,
That stunning beauty shines from thy mirror.
Making a smile to cause thine own heart warm,
Is that vision I wish to see clearer.
For it is my heart that ever races,
At sweet thoughts of thy visage so stirring.
My soul after love's soft dear embraces,
That most tender place I am preferring.
And it is myself full of held longings,
That would stand in stead of thy reflection.
As in thine eye's sight I am belonging,
With my heart singing thy soul's perfection.
O, to be an object held in love's hands,
To show thee where truth's beauty ever stands.
Author notes
markgrif
A contest entry
- A CONTEST OF EVERYTHING by Darc Soul.
490 points, ended May 11, 2007, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - My Anniversary Bash On AP - Plenty Of Options!!! by xxRainbowDawnxx.
700 points, ended June 22, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Romantic Poetry, Help me find my missing inspiration by Arrianna MacEwan.
450 points, ended August 20, 2007, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ONLY Pre-Writes that should have won a trophy. by lindaburns.
1700 points, ended October 22, 2007, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Invite Only Contest [For Nighttime Angel's Favorites Only] by Nighttime angel.
1410 points, ended March 29, 2008, 68 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Invite For... Gold winners Judged by RedwingSpirit.
475 points, ended April 4, 2008, 25 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - POETRY PODCAST - Showcasing your work. by Thom Boulton.
700 points, ended April 1, 63 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 65 of 65
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Oh, very very emotional and strong.
I like this, alot my honey pie cupcake.
How you finished it, was very very epic.
"O, to be an object held in love's hands,
To show thee where truth's beauty ever stands. "
This is beautiful.
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beautiful sonnet. i have wrote some myself, but yours are gorgeous. nice write! i'll see what i can come up with something. thanks for sharing.
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A true and heartfelt Sonnet! I enjoyed this very much. A nice change of pace from your other writings I must say! A beautiful piece of work! I really enjoyed the flow of this. Usually I stray from sonnets, because they kill my brain
But this one flowed smoothly, and was easy on the eyes! Wonderful job my friend!
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Awesome.
I do like to write sonnets as well. I can't say that mine could touch the awesomeness of this one. I will go hunt down one of mine and post it.
Thanks!
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Thank you. This was my first and is still my favorite.
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sigh
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It's beautiful.
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Wow...impressed.
Glad you showed me this Mark, and I can see why you love it's wonderful. Makes me feel .....
I always saw poetry as a way of making love to a woman through writing and I have not really practiced it because I never knew how, thanks for pointing me in the right direction.
Gaylene was trying to explain this to me the other day, now I understand.
Thanks
Simon
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this is one truly beautiful sonnet.. I am quite amazed at this.. something that I have yet to learn how to write. you have such a way with words that totally amaze me.. I am also very surprised that this hasn't won anything.. such a beautiful write.
thank you for entering & good luck
kat
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"As in thine eye's sight I am belonging,
With my heart singing thy soul's perfection."
I have never been a huge fan of 'Old English' (lol!) but it definitely works well with this sonnet
Truth and the recognition of it is a true wonder and love should always come with truth as an escort
p.s. can't believe that this hasn't won something considering as it's been in so much!
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Thanks
Yeah.. it was my first sonnet and in some ways still my favorite one. A unfulfilled wish is to have it win some damn thing. lol
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This is really beautiful I don't think I will ever learn to do this form Thanks for entering Good luck with it
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I am sure you could do it.
My 8 year old AP niece wrote one. She is amazing.
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I love your use of archaic language.
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Another magnificent sonnet from you. This is high end poetic art and has probably come as a bit of a shock to some members (who must have struggled to comprehend how something with form, rhyme and meter has 'just come out' – and like that too!).Lol. Simply breathtaking. Kezz
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I am glad that you showed this to me. As I told you I love sonnets. This was just divine. I would love to know what your source of inspiration is. It's beautiful.
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not bad.
i had to reread it to really get into it but once i did i was hooked. not bad!
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Wow, this is really beautiful. I love the rhymes!
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this is such a beautiful piece. full of romance, beauty and love. I love sonnets and this was simply one of my favourites.
As in thine eye's sight I am belonging,
With my heart singing thy soul's perfection
simply beautiful lines, there is so much beauty in every word. the imagery is strong, the language is awesome and the emotions are weaved through so well. this is simply a very beautiful piece.
great work. loved it from start to end! best of luck in the contests!
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Generally and as a rule, Olde English thee, thou and thy turn me off completely. But your sonnet is so lovely, I may have to rethink that in this case. Thank you for entering my contest.
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I love the form, it isn't one I see from you often, although you're no stranger to writing beautiful poems, and this one is no exception. I love the whole concept if mirrors and reflections. Very well written.
Keep Quilling,
Whiskey
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Thanks *hugs*
Oh I have written all sorts of forms in the last year.
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Very beautiful, well written and so very lovely.
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the beauty within your words overflow cover the hearts of many. This indeed was a honor to read and am extremely happy yousnet the link, Now *cups hands* get in you can be an object of love i mine, a friend for life yu have found. Your an awesome writer.
Best of luck to you friend.
Much love always
Tory
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Thank you so much!
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Well written indeed,despite my not being keen on olde english it worked effortlessly within this.Liked the flip reversal of "and it is myself full of held longings" as if the longing in itself was a warm embrace.
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good job i liked this the ending sticks in my mind
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this is quite a spell you weave. it is so beautiful I love just to read your poetry over and over. You always bring me to the peak and the tidal wave crashes over me with the depth of your details and descriptions. great job hun.
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Amazing
I like this too! It's amazing and well written, yet again. ^_^ -
You are right this is true beauty and so is your write. Very emotional and pretty... I don't know, just something peaceful and calm about it. Thank you for entering this into my contest.
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Ah, very well done, but its all relative, no matter what form we write in, we can become a master with perseverance.
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Perfect
oh...wow, Complicated form it is, but i think i get it!
Lover boy is standing behind a mirror showing the reflection of his love.....So heartening is his love in your poem, that i feel my heart rejoicing for him. (=, I cannot offer more praise than this write, than perfect!
Not to mention the last couplet, parallel the notion of love to a situation which it wonderfully exist.
Draws my breathe away, and spins my longing hard in circle. How i wish for such love.
Haha, again another bookmark....so many today...Either, i must be crazy or you are really good. =P
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Wow, great sonnet..I like the language..meter, rhyme the whole thing, excellent!
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like this one better!! no offense!! its a good poem!! lovin the rhyme!!!
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Well done! Your form is perfect in structure and syllable count the flow is smooth and your meter is on target with the abab rhyme scheme. Your image is vivid and clear. All in all a very nice sonnet.
Love,
Amera
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Thank you so much for taking the time to look at it for me.
Be Well,
Mark
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Nawr, excellent job!!! I am sensing this wasn't your first or near new sonnet. If so, it's even more amazing. This is wicked!! Great job!!!
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It was my first. It seems I myself can not make another one which I am pleased with. hehe Thanks.
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Very nice Mark
Thank you for telling me about it. I think you have done a good job here with your sonnet.. or at least a better attempt that mine, especially when it comes to rhythm and meter (don't worry I have not counted or tried to check the meter..i'm superficially speaking)
Your rhyme was nice and your word choice good too. I don't think there is word as 'belonging' or I have never seen it before
Keep on writing, and good luck in the contest.
Nooni
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Thank you. There such a word belonging. "belonging to so and so"
Maybe people don't use the word anymore? Anyways thanks for reading!
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Awww hun its great! This is my new favorite I think!! I'm a sucker for rhyming poetry what can I say?? Lol great job though and good luck in the contest!
Andi
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Well done.
Great imagery, I love the classic structure and your rhythm fits perfectly. Great flow for a sonnet, you don't usually see that much, although it'd be refreshing to see a sonnet not based on a cliche of a topic. Overall, well done. -
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Thank you for reading. It was my first. I had no idea that loving someone so much you wish you could be their hand mirror was cliche. Perhaps it is sweet love that is cliche? Well if these thoughts are cliche then well I am proud to be cliche. The writing of this was a labor of love(Now there's a cliche) lol
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Yeah.
It was just love as a subject that is cliche. Everyone's written a million poems on the subject, so I typically like to make mine stand out by using an odd subject, sense of rhythm, structure, imagery, topic, or perception. -
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Oh well... what can I say? I love love. lol
Thanks again -
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You're welcome.
Who doesn't, until it hurts enough to long for a past without it? The thing that sucks the most is that the more you acknowledge to yourself that you care, the more hurt you allow yourself to feel if (as it usually does) it ends. Wow. I never used to be antilove. Hmm.
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a nice one for me to see or for awhile somewhat
markgrif (correct to be a dreamer),
This has a take of worthile, what magazines won't do for nor distance of someone commited as cute; so it all reminds me of a baby yes being attractive to a pretty face but ends up thriving on the holds. I've heards this need :
"My soul after love's soft dear embraces,
That most tender place I am preferring."
and it seems the basic fill when looks or talk have an ill time -- also, be oriented from beginning and not to other extremes, though no empty for part.
The rhyming seems to emerge from when one's found a momentamong :
"As in thine eye's sight I am belonging,
With my heart singing thy soul's perfection."
and being in the groove keeps averaging capacity by hopes believed in that can be not apparently grand but by day, around for a stronger one with assistance to even.
11:41 tomatoes in spaghetti squash like a suitcase for my lunch island tomorrow,
Carolyn
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awww
beautiful....very good write
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WOW!
that's so amazing mark! so touching, so written...wonderfully..i love it..i just love it!!! i couldn't do any better!
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Gosh, you have written this so perfectly, my poetic champion! I simply love it! Great job! Smiles, Terry
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This is absolutely beautiful! I like it even better than the first one I read you wrote. I'm going to add you to my favorites because, as I said, I love rhyme, and you are a master at it. Beautiful wording and message. Once again, great write and thanks for sharing. Take care!
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I think the gentleman doth protest too much!
This is amazing, the wording is perfect as is the rhyme and flow.
This is the most Shakespearean sonnet that Shakespeare didn't write.
Great job, I think you have conned us all into believing you couldn't write one, and then BOOM! You hit us with this.
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mark, for a first attempt you have me fooled. awesome job on this. thank you for sharing it with me. viyanna rosemarie
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ohhhh this is great well done you...ohhh i think chris has set a new craze for us all lol good look in the inter group contest with this little number coz its amazing well done xxxx
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Excellent Piece
This is absolutely gorgeous my dear Mark. I loved every word of it. You have done great justice to the sonnet form. Well done.
Keep writing and I will keep reading.
Countrybabe
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In your first stanza, line three, knock off the 'th' at the end of warm for it doesnt rhyme with 'form'
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warmth and form... seem like rhymes to me. lol But warm rhymes and works better. Thank you. I am not use to having to worry about rhyming.
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It DOES rhyme sweetie. I'm trying to imagine how Chandler pronounces the two words if they don't rhyme. Rhymes DO NOT have to be perfect.
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I know it does. but my original original idea was to use warm. lol. Yeah if poetry had to have 'perfect' rhymes well there would be a lot less rhyming poetry. heh
Thanks for reading. -
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This is yum by the way.
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so if I so much as attempt to highlight any part of this poem, I would copy/ paste the entire thing into my comment. It was a beautiful write!!!
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Very good
Nice work,wonderful flow. Good job and keep writeing -
this is beautiful! i knew you could do it. you are truly amazing mark.
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Beautiful sonnet my dear peanut butter & jelly! The rhyme flow is good and love the vivid picture you have portrayed of the beauty of your love in your heart...excellent job!
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This is well done and have shown the true beauty of the soul, not what lies in the mirror.
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