In darkest corners of the deep
Where fallen angels wail and weep
Beyond the echoes of their screams
This is the birthplace of my dreams
In secret halls where terror reigns
With hellish cries and searing pains
Conceptions spark gives life to fear
And I alone am cursed to hear
In darkest corners of my mind
Where living chains of demons bind
Like shackles to the walls of hell
I lie a captive to their spell
In restless nights upon my bed
Their voices raging in my head
As horror taints nocturnal peace
With scenes of doom that never cease....
Oh will I ever find my rest
Before this heart stills in my chest
Or am I damned to feel the flame
Of past regret and future shame
On trembling knees I fall to pray
To take tormenting dreams away
And help my soul to see the light
In darkest corners of the night
Rakerman
Author notes
"Hikaru
A contest entry
- i -- WANT -- DARK!! by Xsafety glassX.
450 points, ended May 9, 2007, 39 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Show Me Your Darkside by AshesFromFire.
700 points, ended June 14, 2007, 112 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Imaginary by know one.
750 points, ended August 29, 2008, 109 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hallows EVE Anniversary! by Kappa Pyua.
2100 points, ended October 31, 2008, 17 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - the DARKWRITE challenge rides again by Ktulu Blackwolfe.
600 points, ended December 20, 2008, 39 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Misfits Enter Here ~ If You Dare by nichtmich.
1750 points, ended December 19, 2008, 30 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Options Rhyme Only by poets whisper.
650 points, ended January 26, 15 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 27 of 27
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great read. It is dark, filled with emotion and the rhyme and flow are flawless.
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well written
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Wow
Written with intense suffering, heart grabbing and pondering such a fate. Well done. Blessings.
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Excellent rhyme and rhythm. The message is one of excruciating pain and acute suffering. Thank you for your entry!
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Excellent form and rhyme here. I think this is good and the dark theme was not lost at all.
**Ktulu Blackwolfe** -
Superb octaves in flawless meter and rhyme. Most wonderfully penned.
Congratulations on a well deserved GOLD!
Let the ink flow!
blessings, Sandi
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This is an excellent poem. It has atmosphere in every verse and the rhyming is good. Congratulations on your contesst win.
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Wow, this too is impressive. Thx for following the rules and for entering my contest.
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I like it! Flawless rhyme and flow. Great feelings, everything is so vivid. I definitely think you should've won more in the contests...
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Beautiful
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You should definitely win the contest you're in. This is amazing, I love the rhyme.
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Thanks again
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a profound write, and in rhyme of which I am also fond,
a difficult medium which you seem to have a solid grasp on. I like how you go from prey to pray, leaving a glimmer of hope at the end. I assume your author name and site is under Rakerman1, Thanks for your darkly splendid entry.~Artis
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thank you my friend and yes Rakerman1 is correct
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You've been hood-winked!
Amazing. Your rhyme and rhythm are so refreshing and the subject matter held my attention! This poem is very good and well deserving of its earned trophies. But I'm surprised it didn't take the gold!
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Hood-Wink
On trembling knees I fall to pray
To take tormenting dreams away
And help my soul to see the light
In darkest corners of the night
Good ending
Rick
From the Bandits
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hood winked
You just been hood winked !!!!
On trembling knees I fall to pray
To take tormenting dreams away
And help my soul to see the light
In darkest corners of the night
These lines touched me I think we can relate to this write just being human.
I have to live with some of this lines myself.
It a powerful write about being very human and making mistakes in life.
It a beautiful write.
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Amazing!
This poem was great! One of the best I've heard so far! It was haunting! The emotion in this poem was shocking! This left me breathless!
You should be very prud of this poem!
Great job!
Good luck!
You really have a talent for writing! -
Darkness given
I asked for the darkes of writes and you gave will all you said in the lines of this poem I loved it and good luck in the contest -
this is a fantastic poem. i've been slowly drifting away from rhyming poetry, but the metre and rythym of this is great. this actually gives me the feel of an edgar allen poe poem, which is a HUGE compliment because i absolutely love the guy. wonderful job and congrats on the win.
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I really, really enjoyed this poem. The imagery was great and the words flowed with emotion. It's got great rhythm and rhyme which is hard to do. Fantastic job!
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thanx for paying attention and putting moosy fate in the authors box...anyho, u get finalists cuz this is EXACTLY wut i wanted and this is THE best of them all. thanx for entering
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Great write Rakerman. Beautiful, as always. The end is really the deal closer, as it should be. I think my favorite line... wait, nevermind. Every line is just too perfect and inspirational and thought-provoking. You're so talented and I'm glad I've found you so that I may experience it. Thanks so much for sharing. Take care.
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You know already that I love your poems, but I'm gonna say it again anyway! I love it! I think the best thing about your poetry is it just flows so damn well. The rhymes are perfect, not simple, not over complicated, they just hit the spot! I'm never gonna get tired of your work! Keep it up x take care x
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this is a truly emotional write. its beautifully penned and the backround makes it all come together nicely. i love this bit:
In darkest corners of my mind
Where living chains of demons bind
Like shackles to the walls of hell
I lie a captive to their spell
In restless nights upon my bed
Their voices raging in my head
As horror taints nocturnal peace
With scenes of doom that never cease....
its beautiful and makes the transition between the bigging and the end come together realy nicely. i can realy feel this write and the emotion behind it.
well done and keep writing becuase you are realy good!and good luck in the contest -
In Darkest Corners
WOW....Rakerman...T'is well spoken of; of what goes on in my mind..with no rest it seems, no calm to find...Only race in depth of death where lays the fallen lips of breath...yes; t'is well spoken of, of the chains of unrest...making spirit reach beyond the test...wow...thats my breath on this mass..thank you for the read... -
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I'm sorry, I couldn't help but see you spelled his name rankerman..
I know he won't mind...it's such a small thing.
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