We have these feelings raging in our hearts
With passion, hate, and love that run amok
There’s risk that they will tear our souls apart
To fight them off we’ll need much more than luck
It’s in our hearts where battles must be fought
When all else fails you cannot let them win
For passion is just love absent of thought
And blind hate is the deepest, darkest sin
So why waste time and energy on war
When more important battles are inside
For peace is quite a concept to explore
The time has come to let go of our pride
Today I am a pacifist by choice
I beat the violence, now I can rejoice
Author notes
"The only devils in this world are those running around in our own hearts, and that is where all our battles should be fought." - Mahatma Gandhi. An inspiring individual and as I am a pacifist as well, one of my many role models. I have always loved this particular quote. Shakespearean sonnet. ABABCDCDEFEFGG rhyme scheme. Iambic pentameter.
Oh, and btw, I always read the rules of contests I enter.
A contest entry
- A CONTEST OF EVERYTHING by Darc Soul.
490 points, ended May 11, 2007, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Rhymes alone are only bones by JM Kenyon.
900 points, ended May 12, 2007, 44 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Quote Inspiration - Win a One Month Silver Membership! by Sharcu.
450 points, ended June 2, 2007, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - BATTLE OF THE SONNETS---ROUND 1 by mamad.
400 points, ended June 3, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - WRITE ME A SONNET by Swan song.
800 points, ended June 26, 2007, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Sonnets, sonnets, and more sonnets by RatherImaginative.
1925 points, ended September 8, 2007, 40 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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Not bad.
I'd say send it to Bush, but he probably can't read it, so it would be a waste of time.
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Excellent meter and rhyming. The second stanza was definitely my favorite, particular this line: "For passion is just love absent of thought". This is true on so many different levels, and not just romantic, as is clear by the message of your sonnet. Don't agree with every sentiment within, for I do believe that sometimes peace can only be found on the other side of war, but I believe that peace should be the ultimate goal. Thanks so much for entering my contest!
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This was a wonderful poem
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Nice. Check your meter in line 8, or the stress in "original."
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Wow! Definately one of the better poems I've read in a while. Awesome job! Nice form, choice of rhyming, etc. Thanks for entering the contest
--Tim -
Great message, well put in rhyme with a nice, serene flow of words. *hug*s and best wishes always... ~Genie~ Note: Due to high volume of entries, I'll be using a scoring system to judge after the contest closes.
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Great message, well put in rhyme with a nice, serene flow of words. *hug*s and best wishes always... ~Genie~ Note: Due to high volume of entries, I'll be using a scoring system to judge after the contest closes.
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To be honest, remove the 's' off of 'heart' seeing how it makes the stanza's rhyme scheme seem off slightly. The message you are conveying is not only true but strong as well. Thank you for entering and keep penning
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ohh, form, somthing hard for me to do,
I love this, it was a great read, The message was awesome!! Pacifist, wow, I cant control my anger enough but I could try!!! & I love how oyu put it in Iambic pentameter form, My mind hates it when I try to constrict word use for the sake of syllables. Awesome job! and good luck in the contest! -
The last line to me was kind of contradicting..only because the whole thing seemed to say "I will not fight" but then the line "Unless you know what you're fighting for" ..without it this would be quite a contradicting piece, but that's irrelevant.
Your rhyming did not stay in my mind, and that's good. You didn't show off the rhyming, you did it..but it wasn't something where the rhymning scheme would stay in your mind for ages. That's really good. I think it may be hard to do that.
This went quite well with the quote. Good luck and you did fabulous. -
good
I like this poem.... I enjoyed reading it very much.... I
really like poems with few caps and punctuations... and this one had both.. good luck in the contest -
Beautifully written.
It's a fluid poem with a nice interpretation and clever metaphores. Good luck!
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I like this. You are truely a great poet. Great job with the rhyme...tough scheme but you pulled it off. I like how you interpreted the quote. Good luck in the contest.
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AWESOME!!
I agree totally. Evil only exist within humans, and only when we allow it. Nicely penned,
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