shes perfectly shaped[inside and out]
thin, blond, blue-eyed & shining
on the outside shes everything beautiful
but inside she feels unperfect
on the outside she tells everyone shes better
but inside, her body crumbles[slowly]
it started with her busy[demanding]life
a skipped meal or two
[a couple lost pounds or two]
no one seemed to notice
she even forgot when she looked back
and saw it for herself.
The dizzy headaches;;painful stomachaches begin
but its nothing unnormal
she should sleep more;she never slept anymore.
her pants got looser, her shirts-baggier
but it's not noticeable enough to cause concern
she didn't have any type of disorder
[though it ran through her mind a time or two]
shes running down silent sunfilled streets
taking in the paper flowers and candy clouds above her
[exercise; work, your body isn't thin enough]
she heard her mind screaming
{shes waiting for release}
as she pushed harder and farther on
but shes only crumbling slowly
[10 pounds isn't enough
you got this far, why not more?]
her hip bones are beginning to show-
deeply defined; her wrists are thinning
they almost look breakable now
menstration slowed, blood became foreign
shes become a withdrawl of the heart
and they're asking for her to make a smile
come back && shine just like she used to be
they can see now[her slow broken body]
her bones;the half hearted pumping veins.
and they seem to care&&they're forcing food on her,
but shes lying[denying]
theres no disorder in what shes doing to herself
only a couple of skipped meals
[[only a lost pound or two]]
disorder or not;;she looks just the same
M. M. O'Malley
4-25-07
9 09 p.m.
Author notes
i've been suffering from an eating disorder since at least early january, and i've just really really noticed now. i noticed the lost pounds but now im constantly tired and my head pounds. im almost fainting, and idk how to stop. i've promised my friends i'll eat, and they even force food on me. so in a way im getting better, but i don't know whats going to happen from here.
x. one last fix .x
[Love,l.o.v.e,yo ur-already/home]
option: eating disorders
please, in all honesty tell me what you think. i hope you like it.
With Love
[[Chaos]]
A contest entry
- && all i want is... your best on the spot dirty pretty by over the rainbow--x.
525 points, ended May 10, 2007, 19 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I don't feel right when you're gone away:: Broken-ness. Pain. Emo by SarahEatsAirplane.
340 points, ended May 17, 2007, 45 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - [D.irrty..P.retty] Drugs, Alcohol, Eating disorders & Piercings by CianLOVES.
300 points, ended May 27, 2007, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
-
fighting an eating disorder is really difficult. It's good you got your friends helping you. If you're interested I can try to explain the "program" I came up with when I was fighting, it worked pretty well for me, and as long as you want to get better it should work for you too. don't give up!
-
ED's Are Tough Ana Has Been With Me Since I Was Nine Years Old. I Can Relate And You Brought It Out Well. Hope You Can Beat Her Cause I Sure As Hell Cant.
Love From Idaho -
-
thanks much.
i hope shes better, or getting better.
love from minnesota♥
-
-
I really like this poem but please read the rules, I would hate to have to disqualify it! I really like this poem, I think it tells the story well. I believe that I am also developing an eating disorder so I can understand where this is coming from. Well done & good luck in my contest x
-
-
is it just not dirty pretty enough?
if thats it, i dont think i can change it, but let me know please.
♥ -
-
Lol no no, it was the put the thing in you AN, but you did, & I was being blind
-
-
-
Holy shit. I was BLWON AWAY by this, and I think it was one of the only poems on eating disorders. I love this, and I can feel every word you wrote. It is so awesome, I love this so much.
-
-
i am SO SO happy you liked it. this was really hard to write about, and when i finally did it turned out to be one of the best ive done in a really long time.
thank you so much. again.
happy judging.
♥Chaos
-
-
Hey, this is serious, heavy stuff being dealt with here. Actually I talk to people that are going through this and other stuff like it. And seriously I would like to know more about what's going on. If you want I'd love to talk sometime, just messege me okay?
-
-
hey, first, thanks for the comment.
second: eating disorders, whether they are to the full extent or not, are not to be taken lightly.(no pun intended) they can lead to so many life long changes/problems, which im sure you know, but to me and my friends who have now witnessed it, its serious and some dont know how to deal with it in any way but to tell me to eat. so idk...i guess we'll have to see where all of this takes us. if you have any questions, any wonders, message me...because im not even sure where to start and to talk about this.
thanks again.
♥Love
-
-
this is REALLY good i like it a lot its sad this happens to peopl
-
-
thank you for the comment.
im glad you liked it, it is sad...unfortunately it does happens to alot of people and most of us dont know how to stop it. we wish we could fix it but again, most of us dont know how to deal with the pressure. so idk, im working on getting better.
♥Love
-
-
'shes become a withdrawl of the heart
and they're asking for her to make a smile
come back && shine just like she used to be
they can see now[her slow broken body]
her bones;the half hearted pumping veins.
and they seem to care&&they're forcing food on her,
but shes lying[denying]
theres no disorder in what shes doing to herself
only a couple of skipped meals
[[only a lost pound or two]]
disorder or not;;she looks just the same'
love those lines ^^^^
i can really relate to this, i dunno kinda in beginnings now, and i see what i'm doing, and i know i should stop and my friends keep attacking me and telling me to eat and saying how can i cure my anemia etc but i dont see the weight that i've apparently lost, great write added to the finalists =]=] good luck in my contest =] -
-
well i'll start by saying thank you for the comment. im really glad you liked it. and the lines you picked out are personally some of my favorites too.
as for the advice end of it...dont do it too yourself. i dont think ive ever experienced real pain until i looked at myself in the mirror and saw what i had done to myself. it was awful. i lost about 10-15 pounds and that hurts more than anything to know i did that to myself. i now weigh 110 and im fighting to get better. im eating more and i believe in myself and thats what you need to do. it seems hard...but i believe you can do it.
ive got faith and please even after the contest is over...keep me updated. i wanna know the progress and know that you're getting better. my luck to you as well.
and thanks again
♥Love
[[Chaos]] -
-
thanks, i just i dunno put on weight and now i need to get that off but i dunno just get back down to a small 8 erm thats a uk size? and now i'm like a small 10 and i just wanna go back to the smae size as before, and loads of people keeping going on at me to eat... but i'm trying this new really healthy eating dieting things. Thanks for caring =] good luck in my contest =]
-
-
just promise me you're not going to starve yourself or only eat one time a day as i did. id ever want to hear or see someone doing that to themselves ever again. good luck! and im always going to care. thats one thing about me you may have already figured out.
♥Love -
-
I've been through that already, i starved myself for the christmas holidays, then i started fainting and had become anemic, so then i started eating just once a day, then in april I was still fainting even though my iron tablets were increased, then it was discovered i also have a calcium defiency, now i'm on this diet plan with loads of fruit etc I have discovered you care lots =] and I'm always here in return =] ♥
-
-
aww..thanks darling.
i starved myself off and on, the longest i went was...actually i have no idea how long at one time. i didnt notice what i was doing to myself, and i just kept ignoring the hunger pains, then i weighed myself and found i lost ALOT of weight. it surprised me and i realized why i had always been so tired, fainting, and just kinda plain out crabby. so idk, im getting better, i eat, on a good day at least twice, and maybe it will be more again, but i highly doubt it.
im always here...♥ -
-
At christmas, the only proper meal i ate a substancial amount of was christmas dinner and thats because i had no way of escapoing that, i'm getting better now though, I eat like a kiwi or bananan for breakfast then skip lunch and have some pasta - carbs for dinner its introducing me back into a regime of eating ♥
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
I know that You Know
i feel the same way hun you and i already talked about this and this is one of my favorite poems. you inspire me in more ways than one and i really do love you. you're a great friend and i hope that you never have to feel this pain again in your life. being a teen is hard and being an adult is harder; but it's great that you have TRUE friends to share this deep words with.
xoxo
beautifulxlie -
-
aww...thanks so much sloane. god you're amazing and so strong. to go through this and kevin and all that other shit, i guess we're alot alike in that sense.
thank you soo much baby for being here...especially lately. i love you forever and ever, dont ever forget it.
♥Love
[[Chaos]]
-
-
=[
-
-
is it that sad darling?
im sorry, but its the truth and i finally started to write about it.
i love you forever and ever
[[Chaos]]
-
-
"her body crumbles[slowly]"
I hope you're okay.
You are beautiful- I already know that.
one of the most gorgeous people I have the privlege of knowing.
♥
~Princess of Shadows~ -
-
i'm getting better now, my friends started to notice more and more and then that guy i told you about he noticed and now they all force food on me. i used to weigh about 117, and now im done to a little lower then 110. which isn't good or healthy in any way. and i dont wanna go to the doctor or anything so im trying to get better darling, i really am.
thank you so much for what you said, one of the most gorgeous you have the privalege of knowing, that means so much and just...thank you. that feels great to hear.
i love you forever and ever
[[Chaos]]
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 25 of 25
