Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Black Rose

strolling the garden on a moonlit eve
petals dance at the caress of my skirt
mystic redolence in the evening breeze
draws my heart to the place of the black rose

I stop to talk to the rose and listen
beauty in velvet petals, grace with thorns
with hints of purple and traces of blood
it's the black rose that is one with my soul

absorbing love of your efflorescence
endearing in your delicate beauty
defense by thorn, I see myself in you
O my black rose, I know you understand

I wanted him so as he held me close
is it by thorn that loneliness claims us?

 

 

 

Author notes

Sonnet (Lannet - contemporary,non-rhyming)

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 47 of 47

  • Hetha gold member
    August 22

    Edit | Reply
    This is lovely, and powerful. Graceful execution of form and verse. The emotion still comes through very nicely. You still have beauty of form in you. Well done. ~Hettie


  • SteveS gold member
    August 13

    Edit | Reply
    Very pretty poem. I like this line "petals dance at the caress of my skirt" ...a very nicely painted image, moving thought from a still frame to a moving picture. Super.


  • Kappa Pyua
    August 13

    Edit | Reply
    This piece sings of sweet sorrow. Imagery is very intense in my minds eye. You still amaze me everyday. Thanks for sharing UNT

  • beautiful font and background. great poem, good luck to you

  • good job. background and color made it a little hard to read. but other than that excellent. best of luck in the contest


    -Steve-


  • creationsfromheart
    April 22, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    awwwwwwwww I love this!


  • paperparadox silver member
    February 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Great dark imagery here, underlining loneliness.

    Very nicely done, and best of luck!


  • Lyndon gold member
    February 17, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Your stanzaic formations are definitely pleasant imageries where you are in the garden alone in the moonlight. There are delicate lines such as:
    "petals dance at the caress of my skirt".
    So easily visualized as well.
    A turning point comes early with the phrase, "grace with thorns". It is here that disambiguation works for you concerning the "black rose" with its earlier ambivalent associations.
    You end with a rhetorical question with the expectation that we, the readers, say 'yes'.
    Thank you Amera for entering this contest. Ron.


  • Sandal
    February 17, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    The loneliness is palpable before you say it. Lovely night imagery.


  • masterblaster gold member
    February 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Hi, a very pretty sonnet, a pleasure to read, Di


  • Lady Altheia gold member
    February 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is really lovely. I like to talk to flowers too sometimes. Good luck to you in the contest. Best wishes to you in your writing endeavors.


  • Melodies
    January 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Am dropping red roses at your feet and smiling at your brilliance. Sweetly done with your magic touches.


  • Tarja
    January 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh darling, you always know how to win my heart. Thank you for the sonnet. I do believe it is worthy of a better picture though. Fantastic job hon. Thank you again for entering and good luck.


  • ellipsist
    November 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    nicely done, indeed! a sonnet with a contemporary feel - I love it!

  • Melissa Gayle gold member
    September 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This piece is very vivid, nicely done.


  • StarEyes
    August 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Now this style of Sonnet I may be able to do. hehe.
    What a great job on this one! And the background, beautiful! This is more than fantastic, it is truly beyond words! I love it!!!!


  • bedovich
    May 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    yaynessssssssssss is so gooodiee


  • Swan song gold member
    May 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    THIS POEM THRUMS RIGHT ALONG. NICE METER. YOUR WORDS GLIDE OFF THE TONGUE. THE LAST TWO LINES HIT HARD
    AND IT MAKES ME SEE GOOD IMAGRY. THIS IS VERY WELL DONE


  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    May 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Oh goodness! This was fabulous!!


  • Whoochi gold member
    May 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I had to come back and relearn and re read and again, pull my jaw up from the floor! You amaze me! you are the Form Queen for sure!


  • painfully amazing
    May 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    each poem is better than the last...i loved this..i love how you write..the way the words flow so perfectly..everything=]


  • sunny day
    April 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Well, another amazing piece from you in perfect form. I have to admit I haven't seen a sonnet that is not in rhyme, this is filled with some vivid imagery and the flow you created with your elegant verbiage is heavenly. Thank you for sharing your beautiful gift with all of us, your ink is surely golden as must be the heart that produces the masterpieces we get to behold. Best wishes in the contest, although it sounds like you have this locked up. Love you my friend, Joyce


  • BlueIsisQueenRaven
    April 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    ~Many Scarlet Applauses and Kisses~

    "I stop to talk to the rose and listen
    beauty in velvet petals, grace with thorns
    with hints of purple and traces of blood
    it's the black rose that is one with my soul"

    My favorite part Amera.
    What brought to my mind
    was mystical and dreamy.
    The flow of petals and
    of beauty.

    That no matter how painful the
    beauteous one can bite,
    her scent and velvet touch
    makes it all worthwhile.

    Her dark forbidden touch,
    so tempting and alluring.
    Calling ones name through
    space and time.

    In dream like sequence we
    are drawn to touch and possess
    the very thing we know may
    imprison us.

    I loved it.
    Bravo!

    Lady Blue~


  • Laura
    April 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow this is beautiful...i loved it all well done and good luck in this comp not that you'll need it this is just perfect xxx
    laura xxx


  • littlemissy01
    April 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    I Love the Black Rose,love the way you caressed the feeling and the beauty of the Black Rose


  • Peteskid gold member
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    a difficult form factor here

    a sonnet to me is difficult, tried it ,not a good result, so i respect those who can...but this doesn't read like a sonnet, it flows seamlessly no forcing the iambs and such..so i am doubly impressed, a wonderful poem here without regard to form, to me an amazing sonnet...PK


    • Amera gold member
      April 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Peteskid

      thank you for your kind comment and applause.


  • grannyeri gold member
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    You are getting quite a collection of thee wonderful forms of poetry - here is another one to add to your list. Wonderful metaphor here - comparing yourself to a black rose, easy to read and understsand as well.


  • PerVirtuous
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    My poetess, you have turned up the light and raised the bar with this work. Very, very nice. Keep up the great work. Flow and imagery are first rate! Metaphor is stunning in it's scope. Three literature bunnies.


  • Desire gold member
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful!!

    This is one Beautiful sonnet my Friend!
    Love the emotions You exude and the image You convey through Your words!
    So darn good at these forms You could weave them
    with eyes closed in sleep
    Thank You for sharing Your Talent!!
    Loved this one too

    Best wishes to You in the contest
    Many blessings too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


    • Amera gold member
      April 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Desire

      Thanks so much. A comment from you is like finding that small unwrapped gift under the Christmas tree.

      Love,
      Amera


  • JohnnyD gold member
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    as a dedication to Amera for this fine poem of hers.
    The darkness is not a reflection on she, but just as a reflection of the angst of her poem.

    http://allpoetry.com/poem/2902590

  • TamikaMariexo
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    *****

    Wow, this poem is wonderful, i would have to say this is even better thann mine it was beautifully written


  • Whoochi gold member
    April 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Hello Sweet gril, this sonnet is beautiful and how you made the comparison with yourself and the black rose is stunning, captivating, yet I say alluring...the rose itself caressed my soul...Always learning from you !

    • Amera gold member
      April 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Whoochi

      Thanks Whooch, I love you more each day.

      shhhh... Don't tell Allan


  • Dalaney gold member
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I bet you were like the smart girl in class Your knowledge of poetry is simply stunning - but it is the poetry itself that makes me swoooooon. Gotta love ya

    Lane


    • Amera gold member
      April 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Oh Thank you, thank you! You came to my house with bunnies!

      Gotta love you too,
      Amera


  • Tconi
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    great

    this is very good dark and alluring i love it
    you should read animedemonchild she deals with the black rose as well but in a darker sence


  • Musimwa
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Inspiration!

    It is an inspiration u have given us here. Dear poet, i am touched. U let me see the rose speak. Keep this up.


    • Amera gold member
      April 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Musimwa

      Thank you for the nice comment and the applause. You are so kind not to think I'm strange talking to flowers. hehe


  • FlaviusArrianus
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Great language use!
    'efflorescence' I loved that word.

    I love the elegannt beauty of this poem, is it dark- but in a more gothic sense. Not morbid, but sad in its own way.

    I liked it alot

    • Amera gold member
      April 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      FlaviusArrianus

      hehe... that is a cool word huh? Thank you for the comment and the bunnies!


  • Fallen Archangel
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    LOVED IT!

    i enjoyed the feelings felt by the story told. And i always like reading of roses. Grand work!!!

    --Lucian Adonis

    • Amera gold member
      April 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for the nice comment and the applause.

      Love,
      Amera


  • face down
    April 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow this poem is really soft if you know what i mean! its claming and just overall great! nice work on this one!

1 - 47 of 47