Poor little girl
Heart all a'whirl
Little boy smiles
Driving her wild
Poor little girl
Going insane
Little boy toying around with her brain
Little boy isn't so small anymore
Little girl feels so much more than before
Poor little girl going out of her mind
Stupid boy leaving her waiting behind
And now all these feelings driving her insane
And left her grey eyes crying
Just like the rain
Just like the rain
Little eyes crying
Just like the rain
Poor little girl
Stupid boy
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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Oh My Gosh!!!!!!!! i freaking loved this the most!!!XD Wonderful write!!!
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Wow. This is like... the story of too many girls in America. I do believe you captured it well.... in a monotone, perhaps jaded tone making it sound like a mere recurrence. Sad. But this unique poem has done its work and made its impact.
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Interesting and i love the lay out. Totally different take on a much written about subject which i found to be very refreshing , well done on a great write
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This is a unique and really superb poem! I am not one who feels that art and poetry should always be radically differt for the sake of mere difference. However, this is GOOD different, which is a rarer thing than most people can even guess. very fine! bravo... bravo... bravo...
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THis is different and unique i Love it it has a great flow to it feels good to read it. Your amazing.
GRIm
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I really like this poem. I think any girl can appreciate it!! Also, your imagery stands out and you have a great rhyme scheme.
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awsome write i love
how u layed it out iv
never seen one like
this befor
love
joshie
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OH EM GEE.
this is amazing. i'll never forget this poem. every.
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I really love how you ended it, with the repeating lines and then the 'stupid boy' that used to be little boy. This poem's really sad =( but it was written so well, and so thoughtfully!
GREAT job
diggin it majorly
A+wesome!
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nice...
i thought that it was well writen... but i have one question... did something like this happen to u? Very nice
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Nice work, its quite different and unique and i feel also that it has a certain sincerity to it, probably meaning that you wrote this from some real feelings that you have, but i could be wrong.
Thanks for the read.
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This is a good write. Not sure what to say really, it's got a thing going. But it feels like it ended on something that could go on. Other than that it's a good write.
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Well done.
You've done a great job on this and have been able to convey your feelings and the atmosphere very well. It is all a part o life and growing up and the never ending learning and I bet you have the ability now to write the sequel where the tears dry up and the little girl has put all that behind her.. Well done.
Bazza
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I like this a lot. The repetition and simplicity of it all, especially. Its obvious that the situation (real or hypothetical) behind this poem is complex, but putting it into simple terms makes it easy to relate to. In fact, I feel like this little girl right now in a situation I'm experiencing.
I don't really know what suggestions to make. -
Bravo on a write well penned. I loved it. Thanks so much for sharing
Continue penning.
Vsutton -
i love it
i love this poem. i can relate and its beautifully written. i wish i could write like this. your an insperation to all. =]
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You have good descriptions, and you express your emotions well. The poem is written beautifully, but the subject matter seems somewhat cliché. I'm not saying that cliché is a bad thing, it just isn't as original as it could be. Either way, you've written a good poem.
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wow
i really liked it! It reminds of how i felt about my x -boyfriend. it was great.keep writing
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Wow. I like it.
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