Carve into the skin we call parchment
With the dagger I call a quill,
Let the blood form words of hatred,
And leave scars where pain was spilled.
Ah, poetry, the hurtful thing!
For which many have sold their souls.
But worth every aching breath
Of the funeral bell that tolls.
Author notes
Dilly Dufu.
My topic here was pain. Poetry does help you get your strong feelings out on paper, does it not? Though, sometimes, it burns to have to scar your soul with the memories of those painful times.
A contest entry
- Density- Short and Deep- METAPHORS!! by TrinityMBS.
600 points, ended May 9, 2007, 21 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Scar my page with your wonderful comments...
Comments
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^^ I love this one. The wording is very well done. I love the imagry and metaphores you used to create it. Congrats on the trophy.
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First congrats on bronze!!
This poem actually attempts to move towards the style of dickenson which I love... The last stanza... RIGHT ON! The first stanza... well you're mistake here is making the analogy too obvious... it's too wordy to TELL the reader that the parchment represents skin, and it's also boring because the reader has nothing to interpret or figure out. Try it this way:
Carve into the parchment
with this dagger of a quill,
blood forms words of hatred
leaving scars where pain is spilled.
Then leave stanza two as is.
Wonderful job, thank you! -
I like this. Profound and dark. Cool metaphor skin/parchment. I'm with you on the author comment, too. I think poetry is one of the healthier ways to deal with emotional pain.
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