School's over and the time has come to be with the little ones.
I walk to the playground right near the building.
I watch as big kids and little kids throw some hoops,
Playing a friendly game of knockout.
As I stand there I feel someone behind me
When I turn I see a boy I've come to love,
He's almost like a little brother.
He says hi and then runs to the swings.
As time passes I wander towards the swings,
I see my sister playing with the younger kids,
Pushing a little girl on the swing.
The same boy who had said hi,
Calls me to swing with him.
He gets off his swing,
And wanders towards the end of them.
Another boys sits,
Swinging back and forth.
Both boys talk a little,
The one wanting to swing,
Asks the other to move,
He doesn't want to.
They then talk some more.
The other knows me,
Not from school,
But from church.
Time passes on,
We finally get to swing.
I watch as all the kids run around,
Playing on the jungle gym,
Swinging on the swings.
Some toss a ball around,
Or toss it in the hoops.
I don't always want to be here,
But I always find it a good place to be.
Author notes
I was just thinking about this earlier today. I'm old enough to drive, but still end up where the little kids arein after school care(elementry and high school are connected-small school)
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Well honestly, it wasn't much of a poem. It was more like a small rant or a short story. There aren't many deep feelings or anything behind it, but it's still very cute. I like the simple approach, but maybe you should try to insert some emotion more than facts into it. I'm not feeling what you're obviously feeling at that point [Except of course, that's it a good place to be]. Tell me more! You're leaving it hanging it mid-air. Perhaps you could include things like why exaclty you like looking at the kids or what's so special about that boy. It's brief to a point of irritation, to be frank. You're just scraping the surface when you could come out with a much more powerful and deep poem. I can't say I'm crazy about it, but it was good. =)
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