The bold waves rock me gently,
As the wind blows my hair,
The light does now flood,
I have nothing to despair.
I peek at the moon,
As it drifts closer to me,
Preventing me from the night,
Giving me a guarantee.
I think of it's protection,
Of how it does not control,
Of how much of it's life,
It has played a positive role.
The memories of your love,
As it protected me,
I recall your kindness,
That set me tension free.
But now I see the moon,
Instead of your fake face,
I trust it more,
It has the grace.
It won't leave me behind,
Like you did so many times,
It'll always come back,
But not to break with silly rhymes.
I don't think,
I just do,
But the moon,
Will soon renew.
A contest entry
- Clicky clicky - c'mon in to my kick ass contest! no.2 by Kahliya.
900 points, ended May 8, 2007, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
The rhyming is very good except in the third stanza - it seems a bit off - also the meter kind of jumps around - I can't seem to pin it down (not that it's necessary to have perfect meter but in certain places you seem to maintain a meter and then temporarily lose it)
The ending is excellent - a note of hope!
Well done and good luck!
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