~*~
Lord
J e s u s
calls children
to His presence.
~*~
Do not forbid them
for of such is the kingdom
and like them you must become
to enter therein.
~*~
Humble yourself,
be blessed by
J e s u s
Christ.
~*~
Author notes
The picture titled "Jesus and the Little One" is a free graphic from Lostseed.com
This poem is based on Mark 10: 13-16 KJV
*Arkquain* Form, created by Arkbear
12 lines with ( 1 ) break between
each stanza, a total of ( 2 ) breaks,
and a total of ( 3 ) stanzas.
The two ( 7 ) syllable lines, must use *end* Rhyme.
Syllable count is:
1-2-3-4
break
5-7-7-5
break
4-3-2-1
~ May be used with graphics ~
In a list
A contest entry
- *~ Poetry Formed V ~* by Arkbear.
400 points, ended April 26, 2007, 20 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 26 of 26
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3 claps...9pts
The Poetic Bandits
~Lilac
-
Love this!
This is a clever form and yeah for you for telling about Jesus.
"Do not forbid them
for of such is the kingdom
and like them you must become
to enter therein"
That is my favorite bit. I just felt uplifted and joyful after reading this.
Wolfie
-
It's a good spiritual write. You should try to get it published in a book of religious poems. The flow is good and the picture fits perfectly with the write.
-
good work on this. Its kind of short, but you've managed to express your thoughts well regardless. Really great work anyways! thanks for sharing!
-
I've tried this form before, and it is tricky to get it to look artistic. This is a wonderful take on the scripture, and your flow is soothing and natural.
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A lovely write and message. I enjoyed reading this one again. A well crafted Arkquain. Congratulations on winning Honorable Mention. Well deserved.
-
Beautiful!
This is just beautiful! Such a lovely form that Arkbear created. I love this and the message, GReat imagery and presentation.
Love & Light
Debbera
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I agree with the others, the poem was beautiful. Perhaps you can explain what ensd rhyme is for I thought it meant the rhyming was exact at the end. It doesn't look to be so in this poem. There doesn't seem to be any rhyming.
-
real nice read the words flowed with ease and a grand imagery... so well written and speaks the true congrads on the HM
-
Commented on this one before you entered it in this reading list. Really is a lovely form used here, created by Arkbear.
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I do love this new form of Arkbears. It is so pleasing to the eye and soothing to read and write, I am sure. Will h ave to try it too. Congrats for getting a HM with this lovely entry.
-
Oh Gosh ~
Dennis ~
What shall I say about such an inspiring message ~
Lovely ~
However, because of the beauty of soooo many writes
in this contest, my point system is helping me tremendously to place the
best at the top ~
Perfect syllable count....message is splendid ~
Presentation is where most Poets are falling short
of some of the other entries with beautiful messages as well...
......but.......
with more eye appeal and aesthetically
structured to create perfection ~
There are soooo many great entries, this is getting very hard to Judge ~
The Arkquain is meant to be Formed with beauty
that takes your breath away ~
Of course the message and syllable count is a HUGE part
as well....but since everyone is doing such a great job with their message,
syllable count and grammatical choices,
I must resort to structure and eye appeal in the end ~
3rd line, 2nd stanza is what took this away from perfection....
...( .6 pts deducted ) ~
However, I have had to say this to at least 5 Poets already ~
Therefore, you can see my delima when deciding
who is going to hold a Trophy at the end of this contest ~
I wish you the best Dennis ~
Thank you so much for taking the time to enter Bubba ~
Bear ~
-
I truly adore this form that Brother Bear has created and you certainly did it justice here, my friend. This is powerfully emotive and poignant. Beautiful work and best of luck in Bear's contest!
~Lori
-
Exceptional penning...
Beautifully presented my friend, I so much like this form of my AP brother's creation, I think it will become very popular...
Eloquently expressed, with a good strong theme and message...I like the picture you have used which compliments your poem perfectly
Love and smiles
~Lilac
-
Such a lovely picture and poem to go with it. This is a great new form that Arkbear has created - you wrote a lovely poem for this form. Wonderful message.
-
Wow ~
It's humbling to see this Form over here
in the Reading Room ~
I wonder what I'll say when it comes time to Judge it!
I can't review it now per say the rules in the contest ~
But I will say it is striking in appearance ~
Beautifully crafted piece of Art ~
Bear ~
-
This is delightful in every way! Wow is all I can say! Love this form and the smooth flow along with the wonderful message it portrays! A delight to read.
Thanks for sharing and best wishes,
Frogz~
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Such a beautiful Arkquain Dennis, with such words of truth therein. Your words flow gently and beautifully but the message is strong.
All the best in the contest.
God Bless.
Gaylene
-
Nice Arkquain. Good flow, form and rhyme. Best of luck in the contest.
-
Beautiful! ANd simple! I love it! Great job! Great picture too! =)
-
So beautifully and simply penned. I love the picture also. Bravo!
-
I absolutely love this. You honor the form highly with this graceful and well written Arkquain. Simply beautiful!! I wish you the best in the contest.
Sam
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YOu have done a wonderful job with this and you leave a lasting impression thank you so much for sharing
warm thoughts
Frozentearz -
Lovely form and presentation. Beautiful rendering of the Mark 10:13-15 passage. Very good flow and tone. Lovely depth of feeling. Good word choice. Nice alliteration and assonance. Well crafted and a much enjoyed read.
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An excellent of of this form, and what a blessed thought it contains. Your versatility as a writer shines through, but your expression of His love does even more with this poem.
-
Thank you Dennis ~
Thank you so much for your entry ~
I will review your entry for certain criteria
expected from this contest ~
If you do not hear back from me within
12 hours of the contest deadline,
you should have nothing to worry
about as long as EVERYTHING in
the RULES have been followed ~
I will review syllable count just once,
AND, if there is/are any line/s missing a syllable/s,
I will let you know only ONCE!
I am looking forward to reviewing your entry ~
However, Judging will NOT take place until
closing of this contest, therefore,
I will TRY not to read the Theme
or Storyline until that time, BUT,
sometimes I break my own rules
and take a peek ~
The best of luck to you in this contest!
Sincerely,
Bear ~
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