An ocean incarnadine spills forth from the volatile chasms of the eyes
Encasing all the world in a sheathe of thick, furious red.
As if the blood of every living creature on the planet
Had been siphoned into a paintbrush of malice and pulsing energy
And painted onto this earthen canvas in a fiery reddish hue
Until all there is to smell is fire
Until all there is to hear is screams
Until all there is to taste is blood
Until all there is to feel is rage
Until all there is to see
... is red
The sky, the trees, the birds, the grass, Red
The sun, the moon, the earth, the stars, Red
Oceans, rivers, streams, rain, Red
Cars, houses, roads, faces, Red
Lovers, friends, family, enemies, Red
Rings, wrists, razors, Red
Arms, legs, fingers, Red
Mouths, necks, faces, Red
Teeth, nails, hair, Red
Eyes...
Violently, viciously, voraciously, viscerally, votively, veritably, inevitably, unequivocably, invariably...
Red.
A contest entry
- Murder by Blossom.
350 points, ended May 3, 2007, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Do You Deserve To Be On My Favourites? by Allure of a Rose.
950 points, ended July 22, 2007, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
-
Nice, very... dark, and red. xD
Loving the ending:
"Violently, viciously, voraciously, viscerally, votively, veritably, inevitably, unequivocably, invariably...
Red."
These lines were by far the best.
I thought you got a little carried away a few times, but this is still a good poem.
-Allura -
-
Well the point was to get carried away, lol. The poem's about anger and that's what anger tends to do, spiral out of control. Thanks though, glad you enjoyed it and I would have to agree the ending is the part I'm happiest with.
-
-
Lol, thought that was the case, but even so.
You're most welcome.
Good luck in the contest.
-
-
-
I love this not only because I love all things red but because your description is so coolly complete, coldly calculating, while taking the reader to the feared and emotional point, also stands back and recounts, with the calmness of the killer incarnate. Bravo.
-
Scarlet emotions
The furious sleep and wakefulness of violent and deep infra red.(Multitudinous seas incarnadine ...)
-
WOW brilliant very violent! awesome! i love the red my fave part....
ALL of it but if i had to choos this bit
The sky, the trees, the birds, the grass, Red
The sun, the moon, the earth, the stars, Red
Oceans, rivers, streams, rain, Red
Cars, houses, roads, faces, Red
Lovers, friends, family, enemies, Red
Rings, wrists, razors, Red
Arms, legs, fingers, Red
Mouths, necks, faces, Red
Teeth, nails, hair, Red
Eyes...
-
i can relate
i have seen this red you speak of, this violence that physically takes over your body, the blank world that is nothing but hate, you are a stranger walking a barren land of malice, the more you fear, the more enraged you become, i have seen this, i have tasted this curse and know exactly what you speak of. im sorry you have to still go through this. this was an amazing way to express it, im truly glad i read this, thank you so much!!
-
Very nice one!!! I really liked it! REALLY!! I love everything about it. I think one of the best I've read so far. Keep up the work and good luck. Thanks for entering!
-
Bloody Good Work of Art
You had me with this one. I love the creative way you wrote this poem. You marched to beat of your own band, and it's a hit! The repetition set a nice pace.
What an astute aura it gave me, sweety eerie, dark prose. Well done, excellent writing, emotion read...novy
-
Wow
Reminds me of a vampire with all that red. Great Job my friend. Words well chosen and wonderfully used.
*Go With God*
Valerie
-
-
I actually didn't think of vampires at all when writing this, for once, hah. Glad you liked it though.
-
-
wow...that's...startling! Vivid and forthright...makes me think of the war that's raging...so very very sad and unnecessary
-
-
Honestly I didn't think anything about war when I wrote this but I can see where you got that from. Thanks anyways, glad you liked it.
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 13 of 13
