(Verse 1)
It's been fifty years and you've never looked better
Baby that's why I'm writing you this letter
As you know I'm dying and won't be around much longer
The pain in your eyes keeps growing stronger
It's only for a while, Until next time
(Chorus)
I'll be at Heaven's gates waiting for you my dear
Ready to embrace and hold you near
It's only temporary for this lifetime
Hold on to your faith eternity shines
Forever and always I'm here by your side
(Verse2)
I am near death and you are by my side
You hold my hand and tears fill up your eyes
I smile at you and profess my love
I'll be seeing you in Heaven above
Goodbye darling it is time to go
(Repeat chorus)
(Bridge)
It's been five years since I left your life
How are you my beautiful wife?
I see that you are preparing to die
I see the peace you hold in your eyes
I am here at Heaven's holy gate
Ready to hold in in a warm embrace
Author notes
Option 3
A contest entry
- † What You Can't Get Back † by Cupcake Craziness.
800 points, ended April 21, 2007, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Lyrical Love by Meyeryakov.
300 points, ended May 17, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
Hmm
I think the idea here is good and many of the lines are good as well. I don't really like the overall feel I have for it. It seems rather morbid to me.
I think you could find some other way to say 'die'.
"I see you are prepared for your demise."
That's a little better, I think. Anyway, just my opinion.
Andy
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Dear Amy
Brought tears to my eyes - I would put it on my IPOD!!! Would want my husband-to-be to sing it to me. Beautifully written.
Peace and love,
Petratani
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a good uplifting piece depsite the theme of death where many tend to go to darker realms where poetry and indeed most thoughts. a good song.
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