Lying like a broken doll;
Watch as blood runs down the wall.
My body sheds its blood so free.
Please, don't shed a tear for me.
As lightning courses through my veins,
My vision closes to the pain.
Feelings flow so I could see
The disappointment he had with me.
I was a failure, this I know,
To make my father hate me so.
For why else would the wire fly.
To this day, I wonder why.
I wish time would turn back now.
So penance could be made somehow.
To be the son my dad would want
So dissapointment would never haunt.
I'm sorry dad, can you forgive
The failure that you let live?
I wish that I could clearly see
How to make you proud of me.
Maybe if I died today
You'd be happy and on your way.
For only hell can make ammends
For all the grief to you I send.
In a list
A contest entry
- The Pain Before The Healing {Now Open To Prewrites} by Viyanna Rosemarie.
800 points, ended May 8, 2007, 14 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
-
A beautifuly written expression of what pains you
Your words have a wonderful rhythm as well as a persistent rhyme scheme. I hope that you found yourself somewhat relieved after having written this. This flows so well. I would imagine it flowed from you just as well when you were writing it. I hope that you can overcome your demons and find in yourself what is most important.
-
-
This did indeed help writting, but unfortunately, not as much as I had hoped. In my mind, I know dad was wrong in what he did, but the child in me still wonders why. Thank you for reading.
-
-
this breaks my heart for you. it is very well written but so heartbreaking. thank you for your entry and i wish you the best of luck in this contest. viyanna rosemarie
-
-
Thank you, Viyanna. I appreciate that comment, but this is in the past and I am dealing with the memories as best I can. Difficult at times, but manageable. Thank you again.
-
-
Ohhh, wow!!! I have to say this piece was so sad and emotional, that it was hard for me to read ..But I felt I had to...I can't say as I know this kind of emotional torment but I certainly felt this write very deep within me...It makes me appreciate the life that I had..To often people take for granted what a good childhood they had, and this write is so humbling..For I know whatever I have suffered, it could always be worse..
Thank you for reminding me to be grateful...I wish you well poet..
Dusty
-
-
Thank you Dusty. I don't think I have had the worst childhood, but when you are around 7 yrs. old or so, it makes one think if life is worth living. Believe me, suicide was attempted many times. I'm sorry to say. Again, thank you so much.
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 6 of 6
