Never allow her to make decisions,
She can’t reason like one must.
All she does is cut at that incision
He carved into her with lust.
So lock her away and swallow the key,
She doesn’t need to see light again,
Never will she drink in all eternity,
Wealth gained from those men.
She can be perfectly content,
Locked up in her cell,
She can’t seem to give consent,
So it’s just been bitter hell.
She doesn’t need to deal with this,
So get it far out of the picture.
Now she can only miss,
What he took by torture.
So now she’s a living mess,
Entangled in fear and desire.
Inside she’s small and so much less,
But deeper there is a burning fire.
Drown her in her own mistakes,
And display her body so people can’t miss.
Life isn’t all fun and cakes,
People need to understand this.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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ok i've got good news and bad news. the bad news-the rhyming seems pretty forced. the good news-the emotion in the poem was strong enough to overcome that. very nice write. however, just work on the rhymingness of it.
love and rainbow kisses,
the existentialist -
i think this is such a great poem
and i know its a serious poem
but i couldn't help but smile at "fun and cakes" :] -
Goddamn that is a good poem when you see it. the theme was amazing, and the flow was perfect. the only rhyme that i can't agree with is picture, and torture. i may say it differently. but o well. it was all good. I love it all, almost as much as you
P.S. When i started this comment, was when i slipped out my first word to pizzi...lol
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what a tale to tell! this was much appreciated and so easily understood for me.. well done
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Wow.
I absolutely loved this.
I'm not sure exactly what to say,
but this was perfect...
the rhyme scheme was great...
and my favorite lines if i must...
Never allow her to make decisions,
She can’t reason like one must.
All she does is cut at that incision
He carved into her with lust.
Great write.
Thouroughly enjoyed!
Jessy
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