The summer sun rose
Into the darkness of dawn
The rooster awoke
Author notes
this is my first Haiku I tried it is lame I know
A contest entry
- Haiku Contest!! by KnightOfTheRose.
325 points, ended April 29, 2007, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
-
These things are hard...You gave a stellar effort, and made a very nice image in my mind Second line is my favorite and the third line my least favorite...a little constructive criticism
-
How about:
the rooster crowed.
No matter a really good poem.
John -
I don't think this is lame at all. I found it to be quite good, the imagery brings one into the whole and for a first attempt, it seems you've written a wonderful poem. I simply like this very much. Good Luck in the contest!
-
ummmm this is weird but i just entered this contest and thought i would check out the competition and when i came across your poem i realized our haikus are almost identical... scary
-
"this is my first Haiku I tried it is lame I know" that is sooooooooo not true! well the first haiku part is probably true but the part about it being lame definitely isnt! I really liked it! thank you soooo much for entering! excellent work and the best of luck in my contest!!!
-Steve- -
I like to see poets expanding into unfamiliar genres ..... only way to go haiku love it i admit it the imagery the zinnish thinking. Know what they say the more you do the easier the flow.... nicely penned
-
you know me well enough to know i know little about style but i found this to be quite nice for your first attempt. much better than any attempt ive made
-
this is good for your first attempt at a haiku great job it paints a good pic for the few words that you got to use. I love you.
-
i dont know what Haiku is, but It wasn't lame. it put a picture into my mind...i can hear the rooster
-
-
seems to be a debate on what a Haiku is some say it must contain one of the seasons but for the most part it is a three line poem 5 syllabols 7 and then 5 again so it is a hard thing for me to do. I run my mouth alot. any way thank you for the comment. I added you as a favirote I am looking forward to reading your poetry I always comment ( although sometimes not in a great way) I am honest. Thank you for the sweet comment
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 10 of 10
